#((sorry for being dead it will happen again))

[orteil42]

hey! if you've been following me for my game dev stuff here's an end-of-year summary

i would've liked to release a lot more things this year but between me moving and other life events i've been a little tight on focus and that's before accounting me being just very slow as a person!

nevertheless, here's what's been accomplished this year:

Cookie Clicker android update - this one was a LONG time coming and is the main reason i'm not writing this year off as unproductive. i've put a lot of care and time into it and i can say i'm proud of that release. some of it will help improve Cookie Clicker on web and Steam in future updates, ie. full offline idling and UI rework. a second, sizeable mobile update is planned at some point later to add sugar lumps, minigames etc

substantial headway on Cookie Clicker's dungeon minigame! it's been a lot of gameplay + layout tests, some resulting in design dead-ends ie. this whole "making the world map in Blender" notion i had. it's regardless seen the most progress it's had in a long time; i'm hoping next year will have me keeping my ambitions in check and keeping it simple enough for a proper beta release. sorry i couldn't make it happen this year again!…

various prototypes that started off as minor side-projects for a laugh or as code warmups but turned out oddly solid? i'd really like to keep pursuing some of these next year to the point where i can start showing off screens and playable alphas. said prototypes include an embeddable music composer/player, a painterly mini-photoshop and some kind of Pokemon-lite with level editor, all browser-based

a good amount of other behind-the-scenes Cookie Clicker-related stuff i'm hoping i get to disclose next year

2025 will see me starting fresh in a new town and hopefully with a steadier outlook on the way i get things done. i've started a good amount of new stuff this year that i'd like to finish in the next one. i'm writing this when i should be packing to visit my family for christmas i'll be right back

[pha55ed]

Cindy Lou Who? || F1/F2

type :: angst

tw/cw :: cheating (all), death (pepe)

contains :: carlos, charles, lando, oscar, ollie, paul, pepe, luke

CONTEXT :: Singer!reader releases "cindy lou who" which exposes how the drivers cheated on her, making the drivers the most hated person on the internet - PART TWO SOON :D

xmas celly here! || f1 masterlist || f2 masterlist

Carlos Sainz | 55

carlossainz55: blue suit and eyes all on me.

→ user 01: OH THIS IS FUCKING EVIL...

⎯→ user 02: the fact (y/n) faced so much fucking racism in the f1 community only for him to get with a white girl... it's giving robert pattinson...

→ user 03: carlos sainz leaving THE FUCKING (Y/N) for the same ex he claimed was toxic???? ummmm

→ user 04: reminder to stream (y/n)'s song 😜😜😜 it's #3 on billboard 100 rn

→ rebecca.donaldson: guess i make you happy like someone couldn't do!!! 😉

⎯→ user 05: quoting her fucking song is so rude and insane. may the worse come to you...

⎯→ user 06: i can't even imagine the rage and sadness is going through and you're fucking laughing at her? THEY COULD NEVER MAKE ME LIKE YOU

Charles Leclerc | 16

f1.gossip : After (Y/N) released "cindy lou who", Alexandra Saint Mleux was seen in the paddock again with Charles and the wags. Fans were blasting (Y/N)'s song whenever they spotted Alex, resulting in her leaving early.

→ user 01: so he cheated on charlotte AND (y/n) for alex??? how strong is her hold on this man

���→ user 02: she gotta have some blackmail or smth

→ user 03: the fact that all the wags are hugging... except alex... yikesss smth def happened

⎯→ user 04: even jade isn't looking at her...

→ user 05: leaving a fucking MULTI-GRAMMY WINNING SINGER for your ex is fucking insane

→ user 06: MAY HE CRASH IN MONACO, MONZA, SILVERSTONE, AND MORE!!!

⎯→ user 07: MAY HIS ENGINE FART!!! FUCK CHARLES OMFG

→ user 08: SHOUT OUT TO THE FANS THAT BLASTED (Y/N)'S SONG IN HER EAR!!!!!

Lando Norris | 04

landonorris : the happiest i've ever been. happy 1 year love

→ user 01: wait wait wait ONE FUCKING YEAR????

⎯→ user 02: didn't he just break up with (y/n) like two months ago...

⎯→ user 03: so he cheated on THE (Y/N) (L/N) FOR OVER 8 MONTHS?????

→ user 04: i thought you were one of the good ones lando :/

→ user 05: even crazier is that oscar, max, AND carlos haven't comment when they used to comment on his posts with (y/n) 24/7

→ user 06: on the bright side... the album will go crazy???

⎯→ yourusername: i guess el oh el

⎯→ user 07: oh bby i'm so sorry :(

Oscar Piastri | 81

f1.gossip : After soft-launching for months on her instagram stories, Versace model Ashlee Collins was seen in the paddock with Oscar Piastri - Confirming that (Y/N) and Oscar are broken up. Goodbye to one of the best WAGs :( We'll miss you.

→ user 01: you know it's bad when even the f1 gossip account is sad

⎯→ user 02: she literally had no drama, was super sweet to fans, AND famous too

→ user 03: oh so THIS is who "cindy lou who" is about???

⎯→ user 04: she's stunning but being a homewrecker instantly makes her ugly in my eyes :/

→ user 05: leaving (y/n), a girl SPONSERED BY VERSACE, for a fucking model under the same brand is fucking insane. oscar lost my respect

⎯→ user 06: that probs means that oscar met this girl while (y/n) was working which is even worse

→ lily.zienmer: sending my prayers for her

⎯→ user 07: OO LILY?!!!??!??

⎯→ user 08: for ashlee or (y/n)?

⎯→ lily.zienmer: both

Oliver Bearman | 87

olliebearman: got rid of some dead weight, faster than every before.

→ user 01: oh so HE'S calling THE (Y/N), PRINCESS OF POP, a fucking DEAD WEIGHT???

⎯→ user 02: The balls on this man is fucking INSANE.

⎯→ user 03: NEUTER HIS ASS!!!!

→ user 04: she's pretty, but is she an award winning, billboard chart topper, AND model??? didn't think so

→ user 05: so half of his fanbase comes from (y/n)... he cheats on her... and then calls her a dead weight?? oh he's fucking dead

⎯→ user 06: might buy tickets just to throw shit at his car

Paul Aron | 17

addison.lillies : i guess i do look like cindy lou LOL anyways, hard launch?

→ user 01: oh... this isn't....

⎯→ user 02: she really thought she ate...

→ user 03: ur hard launch isn't even a whole photo of you two together, sad

⎯→ user 04: getting flashbacks to paul literally posting highlights and posts DEDICATED to just showing off (y/n) but he won't even like this girl's post...

→ user 05: erm... someone didn't understand the meaning of the song

→ paularon: pick better photos next time 😂😅

⎯→ user 06: OH... EMBARRASSING....

⎯→ user 07: was gonna get ur merch but now :/ mannn idk

⎯→ user 08: we expected more from you paul :( we really did

Pepe Marti | 21

f1.gossip : pepe marti was spotted at a bar with his childhood friend, alana. the two were described to be touchy, cuddling, and leaving the bar together in pepe's car while drunk. guess this is who "cindy lou who" is about... sending love to (y/n)

→ user 01: oh FUUUCCKKKKK no.

⎯→ user 02: didn't she just post a story about her aunt dying...

⎯→ user 03: i'm praying for her :( poor (y/n)

→ yourusername: 😀 i mean i always knew but damn.

⎯→ user 04: oh (y/n) :( im so sorry girlie

⎯→ user 05: the most beautiful, funniest, talented, and literal GRAMMY winner getting cheated on by a fucking f2 driver is insane. keep ur chin up girl

→ user 06: i always knew it was weird that he had a girl best friend... feel so bad for (y/n)

[deerspherestudios]

Okay my curiosity is killing me, I saw that you said when Atom makes something it is no longer apart of him so he can’t just become anything…. But at the same time I’m so curious what would happen if he attempted to make like a human form?? Like would it end up as an entity entirely separate from him, fail as a whole, or would almost be like two atom’s to deal with? (That would probably get jealous of each other LOL)

He can make our favorite creature so theoretically he could make a person but like, if he doesn’t fully understand the behavioral characteristics of a creature, can he really make it?

IM SO SORRY I HOPE I DID THIS RIGHT I REALLY TRIED TO LOOK THROUGH EVERYTHING 🙏🏻 I love your games so so much! thank you so much for what you’ve created. Your work has genuinely changed my life for the better. 🩷

Aaa thank you for the sweet message and support! I was gonna explain it in this ask how Atom's transmutation ability works when it comes to creating living beings but the explanation was already so long I cut it out. I'm glad I get to explain it here!

To start, I always intended Atom to feel a bit eldritch-y, so this is probably the part where that aspect applies. Below is a clumsy explanation so bear with me, but to jump straight into it, this was what I had in mind:

So I've established they can make anything as long as they're familiar with it. If you're wondering how it learns, it's kinda hinted in-game when Atom mentions learning recipes from Kiara the cook after it dissolved her. I wouldn't know how to explain how that happens but chalk it up to being an alien lifeform! Also!! Think Warm Bodies I guess!!

Is it akin to a god if it's able to create life? Uhhh, shrug! I'm just having fun with them so just brush past this detail haha.

Anyways, the point is they can make stuff! This can be living and non-living things, but the caveat is anything 'living' kinda acts,,, off? The creature will look like it's alive but it feels like terribly programmed AI if you observe them long enough, with things like:

forgetting to breathe or blink

doesn't eat, doesn't drink, doesn't excrete anything

making the wrong noise

doesn't move like it's supposed to

flopping 'dead' for a few seconds before 'rebooting'

will dissolve into the rest of the worms when you're not looking (thus becoming a part of Atom again)

Extremely uncanny, extremely uncomfortable to watch. But if you ask Atom to shapeshift into something else, it'd still be a bunch of worms making up that shape.

For the sake of clarity, let's say you want a cat, that cat is gonna be it's own cat, however strange it might act.

If you want an Atom-shaped cat,, it's gonna look like worms.

I'll just use this doodle and hope it gets the idea across because I'm having difficulty explaining it but I hope it makes sense!

Edit: Actually now that I think about it, it's similar to this scenario from one of sanfangzhu's fancomics titled Reshape! Though,,, canonically the end result isn't gonna be that graceful hahaha.

[louisferrignojr]

tommy's eyebrows rise to his hairline. “oh?”

buck opens his mouth and promptly closes it. his mind is racing, but the thoughts are jumbled up, every third word being tommy? and the longer he stands there, rooted in front of the door as if he's been frozen in a solid block of ice, the worse his anxiety gets. his heart rate has skyrocketed and his skin is prickling uncomfortably.

tommy is staring at him and the minutes are ticking by and buck is still utterly speechless.

the egg timer rings then, breaking through the silence, and it springs him into action. buck rushes to turn the oven off and grabs the snowflake-patterned oven mitts to pull the tray out, setting it on top of the stove. his stomach grumbles at the sight.

“that smells amazing.”

buck startles and spins on his heel to see that tommy has let himself in, closed the door behind him, and is now standing behind his kitchen island with his hands in his back pockets.

buck nods and wordlessly goes to grab a couple of plates and some cutlery.

“so, uh, is this a new habit?” tommy asks, his tone taking on a nervous edge, and buck looks over his shoulder to see him nodding towards the open packet of gummies on the counter.

“oh. uh, no, not really.” buck says finally and clears his throat, suddenly gone dry as the desert. “old habit, actually. remember when i told you we should buy some, over the summer? to celebrate that they finally legalised it?”

“oh, i thought you were joking.”

buck nods again as he starts plating. “i wasn't, but i — you laughed so — anyway. you can have one, if you want. they're not strong.”

tommy walks around the island and picks up the pack, eyes skimming over the product information written on the back. “i've never had any.”

“what?”

“edibles.” tommy pops one into his mouth, his face twisting into a grimace as he chews the gummy and swallows it. “what flavour is that?” he asks, picking up the packet again. “what the fuck is peppermint pineapple?”

buck snorts a laugh which quickly dissolves into hysterical giggling. he shakes his head and picks up one of the plates and pushes it towards tommy. “here, this should be better tasting. do you want a beer? or... i have white wine in the fridge. i don't like to drink—” he's on his way to fetch the drinks when tommy’s hand on his wrist stops him, and buck stops dead in his tracks. he looks up and meets tommy’s eyes and swallows the lump that's risen to his throat.

tommy looks down at the point of contact between them and quickly withdraws his hand. “water's fine, evan. i'm... i'm sorry for turning up here unannounced. you don't have to—”

buck sighs, deflating. he nods and moves away, grabs himself a glass and fills it at the sink then sits down to eat his meal, keeping his eyes on the food on his plate and very carefully not watching as tommy moves around his kitchen, with the same ease and comfort he used to.

it almost feels like any other evening, the two of them settling down for dinner at the end of a long day.

except he's still heartbroken, and he's still wondering what the hell happened, and he's still missing the man who is sitting across the table from him

and he's fucking stoned, too, on top of all of that.

buck is spending the first day of his 72 off doing absolutely nothing. he's been picking up extra shifts all of December, offering to work so someone else can have a day off and go see the play their kid is in or take their girlfriend to the Christmas markets. and when he's not working, he's working out, he's baking, sometimes he's babysitting, he's been keeping busy.

but he's exhausted in a way he hasn't been in a long time. so he put a tray bake in the oven and settled on his couch with his pillows and blankets and he's half an hour into die hard and he's a little bored, to be honest. he has no idea why tommy called it a Christmas movie, first of all, and a classic; and chimney agreed! he feels himself getting sleepy, and he's about to pause the movie and exit the Netflix app altogether when there's a knock on his door.

buck gets to his feet with a grunt that makes him sound older than he is, and wraps one of the blankets around his shoulders — a really plush wine red chenille — as he goes to answer. when he swings the door open and gets a look at the person standing behind it, he forgets how to breathe altogether.

“hey,” tommy says softly. “can we talk?”

buck’s eyes grow wide. “i think my edible just kicked in.”

[vhswolf]

It's not a goodbye, but a hot see you soon | Lando Norris x Reader x Daniel Ricciardo

English is not my first language, sorry about any mistakes :)

Warnings: Voyeurism, being called a good girl, kinda sad beginning if you squint, smut, I think that's all

Daniel Ricciardo retired, he really did. I was way too sad about it, more than I should, specifically because he is just my boyfriend's friend. The problem is that he's my second favourite driver, and when I finally got to talk to him without blushing like crazy he will retire, that's not fair!

When Lando caught me crying on his drive's room after the Singapore grand prix, he didn't even need to ask what happened. He sat by my side and hugged me.

"Come on, love, his not dead, his retiring, we will see him again."

"I know, but I won't see him every other weekend, and he won't race." My voice was weak, Lando didn't know if he laughed or kept telling me everything was going to be OK, and I don't blame him, I feel fucking pathetic. "I'm stupid."

"You're spending too much time with Charles." He dried up my cheeks with his thumbs and made me look at him. "Look, it is a bit funny, I'm sorry, but I understand that you really like him. I don't know how you're dating me, not him." I furrowed my eyebrows, but before saying anything, Lando stopped me. "I'm not mad or jealous, don't worry. I'm just saying that I understand, but I promise you we're going to see him again." He kissed my forehead. "I'm gonna get you a water, you stay here and try to calm down a bit, OK?" I nodded slowly. "Great, love you."

"Love you more." He got up and walked out of the room. I took a deep breath, trying to calm down, but to be honest, I didn't have any more tears to cry, so I just hugged my knees and closed my eyes to rest a bit. I don't know when but a drift off to sleep, and woke up with someone calling me, when I opened my eyes I saw Daniel and Lando standing in front of me.

"Hey, you're fine?" Daniel asked, taking a few strands of my hair off my face. I nodded, still waking up. "You're really cute."

"I always tell her that, she never believes me, maybe now that her favourite boy is telling her that she will believe." Lan said in a playful tone. Danny sat by my side and Lan just stayed leaning against the wall looking at us.

"You should believe Lando, he has good taste." He opened a bottle of water he had in his hand and I didn't see before and gave it to me, I took it and drink a little bit. "I heard you're really sad I'm retiring." I nodded shyly and Danny smiled. "You don't need to be, come on, it's not like I'm going to give you some peace, I will FaceTime you every week to know all the latest gossip." Daniel looked at Lan that just nodded with a smile on his face. "That sounds good?"

"It does." I said, but I was still visibly sad, it wasn't the same. Danny sighed and picked me up and put me sat in his lap. I looked at Lan, but he was still calm like nothing just happened, but when he saw me looking at him, he came over and gave me a kiss before whispering to me.

"I'm fine with it, if you're fine with it." And then he sat where I was before. I took a deep breath and lay my head on Danny's shoulder into the comfortable feeling.

"It will be just fine." He put his hand on my waist, squeezing me again to him. I felt calmer right away.

"Promise?"

"Promise." It started on my waist, but he didn't limit it to just one place, his hand wondered my leg, my arm, and lastly my ass. I also could feel him getting harder and harder under my butt. I really don't know what is happening here, but I'm not mad, and knowing my boyfriend as I do, if he was jealous or mad we would've heard it. His wandering hand was now playing with the hem of my shirt and touching my skin underneath it. I heard Lan getting up and walking up to the door, my head involuntarily shoot up to look at him, see what he was doing and what I saw was Lando locking the door.

"What are you doing?" Lan looked at me and smiled.

"Well, you need to say a proper see you later to Danny." I looked at him confused as he walked towards us. "Now..." He grabbed my face, making me look at him. "Show Danny how much of a good girl you can be."

"Are you serious?"

"Yes, I'm, I know how much you want it."

"Lan, but if you..." He stopped me.

"Do you want it?" I nodded shyly. "Then stop questioning me, Jesus. Here." He took off my shirt and threw it on the floor. "Give me a show." He kissed me and walked away. I looked at Danny, that smile at me.

"If you want me to stop at any moment, just tell me." I nodded, and he reached around me to unclasp my bra, which he did with ease, I helped him to take it off and throwing it on the floor next to my shirt. "You're lucky, mate." Danny said to Lan.

"I know." Lan response made me smile, but my attention was robbed by Danny that attacked my breasts with his mouth.

"Fuck, Danny..." I rocked my hips back and forth in response to it, he pressed me even more against himself, making me feel every inch of him under me.

"Let's take this pants off." I got up quickly and started to take my pants off as Danny unbuttoned his jeans. I look to Lan that was sat a bit far away with his dick in hand, I smiled at him that smiled back. Daniel's hands pulled back to his lap, now straddling him. I looked down as I was placing myself, he had put a condom already and all it was left for me to do was enjoying the ride. I lowered myself on him, slowly taking in every inch of him.

"Danny, oh god." I felt his lips on my neck, making me moan against his shoulder.

"You feel so fucking good, you're like an angel." He held my waist, squeezing it with his hands as he helped me to bounce on him. "Great view back there?"

"Amazing." Lando's voice was shaky with pleasure, it only made me want to put an even better show to my beautiful boyfriend.

"Good." My hands went to Danny's hair pulling it back making him look up a bit, I looked at his face and kissed him, God, I really always wanted to do that. He kissed me back in need, it was a sloppy kiss, but it was even better than I thought it would be. Knowing that he wanted me as much as I wanted him was an ego booster, and I wouldn't change anything. I started to go faster.

"I'm gonna cum." I whispered in Danny's ear.

"Yes, cum for me, kitty, show your boyfriend how good I make you feel." His eyes never letting mine, I got my high and after a couple seconds also did Danny. Both of us moaning way too loud, forgetting that we weren't alone in the building, but I guess it only made Lando like me because I could hear him moaning right to us.

"Mother fucker..." Lando's was significantly lower than me and Danny, but it was enough to make me feel goosebumps after hearing it.

"You really are a good girl." Danny said, and I kissed him once more.

"Thank you." I smiled before feeling my hair being pulled back, just enough for me to see Lando with a big smile on his face.

"Open up." I opened my mouth, and he put two of his fingers in it, I could taste his cum coating them, so I did what he wanted, and I suck it clean. "Good girl Indeed." He took his fingers off my mouth and kissed me, tasting himself on my mouth.

"Feeling better?" Danny asked, looking at me.

"Better than ever, thank you." I gave him a little kiss and turned back to Lan. "Thank you too, babe."

"You're welcome, it was really hot to watch, I'm not mad about it."

"I'm free anytime you want to watch it again." Danny joked, but we all knew, it wasn't all joke.

[pupuyvs]

lost

pairings: aespa x reader?? idk its not romantic

wc: 1k+

warnings: heavy angst, you’re dead…sorry, mentions of suicide and abuse

a/n i just wanted to test out writing so uhh enjoy this short stuff (and feel free to yell at me in my inbox :D)

Being friends with Jimin felt like an escape, to be in her group you only had to follow one rule: never discuss the past. The rule worked for them, you all had problems and none of you had to discuss them.

No one brought up how you seemed to fear fire more than others, nor how Minjeong seems to have a strange aversion to water. They didn’t discuss how sickly Aeri often was or how Yizhuo seemed to always appear with new bruises, and they especially didn’t mention Jimin’s disdain towards being touched. And it worked that way, at least it seemed it did, that was until you died.

Suicide, the police told them. The note had been severely burnt, the only piece left having the word sorry written on it.

At your funeral they stand before your picture, one they have never seen before, you look happy – it makes Jimin sick.

They stay until your grandmother arrives, Minjeong not wanting you to be alone. It’s silent as they make their way to the old train tracks, the rocks rolling under their feet being the only sound around them. When they arrive at the train cart they made their second home they each grab a drink from the stash they had accumulated over the years, each taking a sip. They come to a silent agreement that this is also something they won’t talk about.

This agreement only lasts a couple weeks, it’s Yizhuo that breaks first. Her bruised hands shaking as she sobs. It was an honest mistake, someone asked where you were and Yizhuo snapped. It took all three of them to pull her off as she screamed at the person for not knowing what happened to you – she broke down when they left the store. Yizhuo leaves them when she stops sobbing and when she appears the next day with a bruise on her bottom lip they don’t discuss it.

Jimin doesn’t know how to deal with these types of things, she tries to get the group to function as it once had without you, but it’s nearly impossible as none of them can remember the time they had without you.

Aeri slips up next, between her bouts of coughs she asks you to pass her some water. She freezes as your name slips out of her mouth, the air in her lungs rattling as she takes a deep breath in. Jimin rushes to give her a water bottle, praying that this passes, that they can move on, but Aeri is already hyperventilating. It takes Minjeong holding her closely to calm her, thanking Jimin softly as she hands her the water. When she sits next to Yizhuo she misses the way she clenches her hands and how the cuts on her knuckles begin to bleed again.

The beach sounded like a good idea to Jimin, but as Minjeong screams at the top of her lungs she realizes that she may have made a mistake. It started off fine, the beach wasn’t packed as it was winter and the girls listened to the waves from the truck Yizhuo had stolen from her father. Then Minjeong brings up how you loved the ocean, a fact Jimin didn’t know. None of them respond, the waves crash against the rock wall nearby, and Minjeong yells.

Jimin is wary, but when she moves to stop her Aeri grabs onto her, she flinches at the sudden touch but listens to Aeri and moves back. She doesn’t stop till her throat gives out and the ocean calms, on the drive home they stop to get her cough drops. They never bring it up again.

Jimin swears that it doesn’t affect her, she had a handle on her emotions — she was fine. But then she dreams of you, it’s nothing crazy, it’s actually laughable how mundane it is. You guys were on a train eating honey bread, she assumes it’s from the movie she watched earlier. But maybe that simpleness is why when she wakes up she calls you, it isn’t until the fourth ring she remembers that you now only exist in the dreams and memories she holds.

When the group comes together that day their regular silence is off, it’s no longer comfortable nor familiar. Now it’s forced and suffocating, and it’s why Jimin speaks up first.

“Let’s go see them.”

Your grave isn’t anything fancy, it has a bouquet and your picture. The headstone only mentions your name and how you were loved, who you were loved by missing, but it doesn’t anger Jimin because she knew her and the others' names were too long to fit on it.

Minjeong cries first, she sobs when Aeri’s shaky hands lay the few flowers they had collected along the way on her headstone. Yizhuo follows right behind, her sobs come out rasped, her throat still rough from her father’s discovery of the car incident. And when Aeri cries, so does Jimin.

They don’t speak, just sob with each other, and they continue that way until a voice pops up behind them.

“Oh, you’ve finally come.”

Your house, or your grandmother’s, is small but comfortable. Your presence is felt in every space as markings of you grace the wall. The friends sit on the old couch in your old living room — Jimin wonders how many times you have sat here too.

Your grandmother comes back with water for each girl, Yizhuo helping her carry them. When Yizhuo sits next to Jimin your grandmother begins to speak.

“I’m sorry I didn’t get to greet you guys at the funeral, you were gone before I could say hello.”

The girls don’t respond, all of them feeling bad for leaving the woman alone on the day. But the older woman doesn’t seem to notice as she reaches for the box that was on the table. Pulling out pictures from it, they watch as she goes through them before seemingly finding one and handing it to Yizhuo, who is seated closest to her. When the picture is passed to her Jimin stares at it, an odd feeling fills her.

You were smiling while an older woman held you, there was an innocent light in your eyes, a sight the group had never seen. Jimin passes it to Aeri once it becomes too much for her.

When the picture reaches the last person, Minjeong, your grandmother starts to speak. “This was Y/N and their mother when they were younger,” the older woman sighs heavily. “She had died in a house fire when Y/N was only ten, Y/N had watched as the house had crashed around their mother.”

They watch as your grandmother starts to cry, all wanting to comfort her, but not knowing how to since they were never comforted themselves.

“When my grandchild came to live with me they were a shell, but when you guys came into their life, they became alive once more.” She pauses.

“Thank you for letting them experience happiness once more.”

Jimin rushes out the house with her heart practically jumping out of her chest – she can’t breathe. The world seems to be closing in as sobs rush out of her.

The woman’s words repeat in her head like a broken record, it's practically mocking her as tears fall down her cheeks. Grief rushes through her body before settling in her chest, where it screams, begging to be let out. And Jimin wants it to, she’s begging for it to leave her body.

The weight is unbearable as it pounds on her chest, the sobs tenfold, her ears ring. She wants it to end.

She doesn’t know how long she's sobbing, or panicking, for, but it's long enough for the girls to join her and pull her into a hug. And when she calms she feels relief when she realizes they are crying too.

A few weeks pass by when they find themselves at the beach again. They shiver slightly as the cold bites at any exposed skin that it can.

“Here.” Yizhuo says as she passes each one their envelopes, her fingers rough with the bandages Minjeong had put on them recently.

Jimin stares at the envelope, tracing the ink that engraves your name. Looking up she sees the girls look at her and offers them a small smile.

“Ready?”

They all nod to Aeri’s question before leaning down to attach the papers to the lanterns. When they’re sure it’s snug enough to not fall, Minjeong picks it up and walks closer to the ocean, the others following her closely. Grabbing the lighter from Jimin she lights up the bottom of the lantern, when she feels it’s light enough she puts it up gently and lets the wind take it away.

They hold each other’s hands as they watch the lantern disappear. Aeri is the first to pull away, walking back to the car, and Minjeong follows after her. Yizhuo goes soon after with a pat on her back. Jimin waits until her mind can no longer imagine the white dot in the distance, breathing out; she feels the slight ache in her chest return. She breathes out once more as Minjeong had taught her and feels it dull just enough to whisper out her final words to you.

“Goodbye Y/N.”

[slimybeth69]

Touch: Part 2

Din x f!reader 18+ MDNI

Summary: The Mandalorian thinks you're an incredible artist and he just loves your doodles so much that he couldn't stop himself from doing what he does. He makes up for it though.

a/n: I know so very little about the Star Wars universe. I dunno shit about fuck when it comes to planets and ships and how things work. You'll see what I mean in later chapters, but I'm just warning you that I make a bunch of shit up, and am probably entirely incorrect about some of the things I may talk about in this chapter or upcoming chapters. I'M SORRY. I JUST LOVE THAT HELMETED MAN AND HIS GREEN CHILD, OK???

unbeta'd, poorly proofread because of my AHDH

Mando was gone when you woke up the next morning. Bed empty. Left you wondering if it was all a dream. He’s gone. 

With your notebook. 

It’s gone too. Nowhere to be found. At your own expense, you tore the ship apart looking for it but you can’t find it anywhere. The child loved this game. He helped massively. 

Maker.

What is he doing with it? Why does he still have it? 

You think you know the answers to all those questions but you’re still freaking out a little. Mostly because he has it.

Really it’s because now you’re stuck with nothing to do besides stare at the child. Which you’re currently doing. Just staring at him. And his big eyes and ears. Little robe. Where’d he get that little robe? You should make him a new one. Ask Mando to buy fabric and sew him a new one. 

He’s so cute. You pick him up and carry him outside so you can lay in the warm sun together. He does, for a while. Snuggles beside you and then moves to your head and plays with your hair. You make him a flower crown.

You don’t know where you are. You stopped asking Mando. Stopped caring, mostly when he made you stay with the ship. He brought you everything you needed. You had to stay with the child. Something about a fire and the ship being at risk if the kids left alone for too long. You don’t know. You didn’t care then but now you’re bored. And your mind is wandering.

The kid just stares back at you.

“I know. I’m bored too.” You say to the child, he responds in little baby coos and warbles. He looks at something on the ground by his feet and picks it up. He inspects it for a long time and then looks between you and the object in his clawed fingers. Then he holds it up to you to take from him. You do, and you inspect it as well.

It’s a dead bug. 

“Thank you...so much .” You gently set the dead bug down next to you. The child goes searching for more; he thinks you love your gift. You must want more. So he goes to find you as many as he can. You end up with a little pile of dead bugs and leaves and pebbles next to you. 

You think you love the child and that's weird to you. Because it's a baby and you don’t normally like babies. But he’s not like any baby you’ve ever met before and you think about what’ll happen when Mando doesn’t need you anymore. It actually knocks the air out of your lungs. 

Impossible. 

Unthinkable. 

You didn’t really plan for this. To get attached to the child. 

It just happened one day. Now it’s your child. You’d do just about anything for the lil’ green squirt. 

But he’s also not your child. He’s Mando’s. Don’t forget that. It’s his kid. 

Mando was gone for two days before you saw him again. When he did return the child was already asleep. But you were still outside looking up at the stars around the fire.

“I told you not to–” A voice rings out in the darkness and you nearly fall into the fire. You move so fast you almost stumble right into it trying to get away from the voice behind you but there’s a strong hand on your shoulder and stops you from moving. 

“What the-” You place a hand over your heart and pant softly. “Why!?” You shout, pushing his hand away. “Always! With the shaking me and scaring me in the dark!” You snap.

“I still didn’t shake you.” His helmet is tilted down to look at you. “Do you need me to define the word shake to you?” 

All you can do is blink at him. 

“Where is my notebook!?” You point a finger at him accusingly and attempt to leer at him. “I thought you’d put it back when you were done.” You say with contempt because you really did think he was going to put it away. 

But really, if you’re going to be honest with yourself, the last two nights have been you laying in his bed thinking about what he’s doing with your notebook. And you’re doing the same thing he you hope he’s doing. And you can smell him on his sheets. It’s his natural muskiness and it’s amazing. You fall asleep when you’re done cradling them to your face just to try and be close to him. And he wasn’t even the one who made you come that night together. You did it yourself! You cannot stop thinking about it though. Not at all. It’s the only thing you’ve thought about besides keeping the child alive. 

“I took it with me. I also told you not to be outside after dark when I’m not here.” He said it sternly, like he did when you made mistakes. 

You could hit him. Maker, you could. You think about how the beskar would feel on your dainty- has never seen any sort of forced punch– fist. Also, he’s got a lot of weapons in there. And the Amban on his back.  So you decide that in his best interest, you shouldn’t hit him.

“Well, it’s a good thing you're here, isn’t it?” You snip at him. He shakes his head. 

Mando stares at you for a long time. Saying nothing like always. Maker please, make him speak. 

“I got you something.” He says quietly from behind the modulator. 

What was that Maker? Huh? What’s a notebook? I’ve never seen a–

“You what?” You ask, stunned. Because he’s barely said a total of twenty non mean words to you this whole time before two nights ago and now he’s getting you gifts? As in something you didn’t tell him you needed and he got it with credits you gave him for it? You know, because he doesn’t let you go anywhere.

“Here.” He says, pulling something out from underneath his cape, maybe stuffed into a pocket or a bag, you dunno, but he pulls out another notebook. Not your notebook.  But another one. A new one. There's a new charcoal for you as well. 

You take it from his outstretched hand and stare at it for a long time. You’re the silent one now. 

“Do you like it?” Mando asks after a few quiet moments. You nod, unable to really find the words for how you feel about it. He watches you, looking at your gift and stands by the fire with you. 

“Thank you.” You finally look up at him. He’s got his head tilted down at you still. 

“You’re welcome.” Said so simply like he didn’t just make the last two days so lonely and bori– Hold on one Maker loving minute.

“Where's my other notebook though!?” You ask suddenly. There is no alarm in your voice, just curiosity, because now you kind of like the idea of him carrying it on him while he travels without you.

Mando’s head turns away from you, like he’s observing your guys’ surroundings so intently. 

“Mando.” You drop your head to look at him through your lashes. 

He doesn’t say anything, he’s staring up now and then points his finger up to the sky. 

“Do you see that star-” He starts. 

You groan in frustration, closing your eyes and putting your forehead in your hand.

“Did you lose it?” You ask after a minute. “I won’t really be that upset if–”

“I didn’t lose it.” He’s offended. “I can keep things safe.” He responds quickly. You blink at him. “I keep the child safe. You.” He motions to you with an up and down gesture.

“First– give me some credit for keeping the child safe.” You’re still looking up at him. “Did you know that he jumped into that river over there–” You point behind you. “Did it two times. He cannot swim. I had to go in after he started floating downstream! I’m here with him all the time. Every waking and sleeping second. I’m not saying you don’t keep us safe.” You hold your hands up. “I don’t really know what you do when you leave us here in these fields or deserts. I really dunno, but I’m sure it is keeping us both very safe. Second– You still have the doodles then?” He nods at you. “Can I have them back please?” He shakes his head from side to side. 

Oh Maker ! Is this what I get for doodling? Is this my punishment?

“I’d like to keep it.” Garbled modulated voice from underneath the helmet says so casually. Like he didn’t steal it out of your bag. Like you let him give it a test run to see if he’d like it and now he does and wants to keep it. “That's why I got you the new one.” He’s trying to justify it, funny.  

You look at him with disdain.

“I’ve upset you?” He asks curiously. “You’re…” 

“I’m just really disappointed in you.” You shake your head at him. You’re not as disappointed in him as you’re saying, you’re just saying that because he’s just being really cute right now but you’re not gonna let him know that. “What do you want it for so bad anyway? Gonna rub the charcoal all off it the way you’ve probably been touching it.” You snap at him. 

“I looked at it while I was gone.” He says. “I thought of you.” 

Okay . He can keep the notebook. He can have it. Because he was thinking about you while he was gone and you wonder what else he was doing while he was thinking of you, looking at it. 

He finally sits down next to the fire with you, not close but he sits, and lets out a loud sigh as he leans against the log behind him. 

“Did you have a rough day?” You ask quietly. He shrugs and picks at something on his beskar. When he does that it reminds you of the child.

“The child got all these dead bugs and gave them to me the other day. Like all the dead bugs he could find. He didn’t try to eat them or anything. Just gave them to me like they were a gift.” You chuckle nervously. 

“I hope you like mine more than his.” He looks over at you. 

“It’s a close one.  I won’t lie.” You smirk at him and wonder if he’s smirking back at you.

“So, can you ever take it off?” You motion towards his helmet. He touches it gently with his fingers. “You kept it on in the complete darkness the other night.”

“I can. No one can see my face though.” He explains carefully. “I kept it on to see you. I like to look at you sometimes.”

“Wh-what?” It’s like the breath got knocked out of you. 

“My religion. It’s a part of the creed I was sworn into.” He explains the helmet.

“ Sometimes ?” You raise an eyebrow. “You’ve done it before?” 

He looks away from you. 

“I’m ashamed of it. But yes. I can’t help it.” He’s still looking away from you, into the woods on the far side of the field and you wonder what he can see over there that you can’t.

You think for a long time, a lot of different thoughts running through your head. 

“What happens if someone were to see you?” You ask, changing the subject because you decide you’re not mad about it. Mando looks back at you.

“I wouldn’t be able to put it back on.” He explains. “I’d be banned from my creed.” 

Oh. That’s serious. You don’t know as much about Mandalore as you thought you did. 

“And that would make you upset?” You’re curious and he’s chatty.

“I’d be…” He trails off again. “ Disappointed .” 

You know he’d be more than disappointed but that’s the word he chose, so, you roll with it.

“Then let's not have that happen. No one likes a disappointed Mando.” You tease, reaching out and he lets you touch your foot to his with a gentle tap. He doesn’t pull away, not even after he sees what you’re doing. 

“Especially you. What’s the ship look like?” He tilts his head down as if he was looking at you through his eyelashes. 

“Clean. Surprisingly.” You snap. “ Someone took my only form of distraction so I actually had to do something today to not die of boredom.” You explain sassily. 

“So I should keep the new one too then?” He teases you. 

“Please Maker no.” You grip the notebook to your chest. “I need it.” 

Then he snorts or laughs or something. But it is the sound of air being exhaled at force through his nose and it's loud enough to register in the modulator. Your head snaps over to him. “Did I just make you laugh?” You’re stunned.

It's been so long since you’ve spoken to someone who wasn’t green or Mando himself that you’ve completely forgotten how to talk to people apparently, because you can’t think of another time in your entire life that you’ve asked someone if you’ve made them laugh. 

Okay. It’s not common that the person you're trying to make laugh has a helmet and face visor on, but still. What a weird question to ask. 

“Maybe.”

Now we're back to the short simple responses and you have an idea. A scary one, but an idea.

“Would you like to know what I did while you were gone? Besides, swimming after the child and cleaning and being bored?” 

The reason you’re nervous is because you don’t know how he’s going to react. At all. He could hate what you’re about to tell him, he’s so particular and he can be a little abrasive sometimes, so yeah, kinda nervous. 

“I would.” He’s still looking at you.

Okay, he’s on the hook and now we just have to reel him in. You lean one elbow on the log behind you and turn to him.

“I slept in your bed.” You say it quickly to see how he reacts. 

He doesn’t move. He doesn’t speak.

“Do you– you sleep on the floor when I’m not here?” He asks, shocked. 

Now you’ve completely forgotten what else you were going to say because you could have been sleeping there the whole time? And you’ve been sleeping on the paper thin mat instead when the bed has been empty.

You blink at him. 

“Don’t do that anymore. Use my bed when I’m gone.” 

You keep blinking at him.

“You didn’t think to tell me that?” You’ve been distracted from your original point. 

“I thought it was obvious.” 

This makes your eye twitch softly. 

“Okay.” Because it wasn’t really obvious. He’s yelled at you every day he’s been here except for the night. So why would he want you in his bed?

“Is that all? Was that supposed to make me laugh?” He asks. You stare at him.

“No. It wasn’t. But now I’m mad and I don’t want to tell you anymore.” 

“Tell me.” He says it softly but the modulator messes it all up and you don’t get his real softness. You might never get it. Probably won't. 

“I touched myself thinking about you touching yourself looking at my notebook.” It comes out way less sensual and sexy than you had planned on saying it but it does the job. He gasps softly but loud enough to register.

“You did?” His voice changed immediately to being filled with awe and excitement rather than just sounding like he was putting up with you.

You nod at him, softening slightly because you like when he talks to you this way. Nicely and sweetly. 

“D-did it g-get..” He pauses. “Did it get wet?” 

You nod. 

“Maker.” He sighs. You can’t help but smirk. 

“How many times? Please tell me.” He’s leaned in, apprehensive of what you have to say. 

“Four.” You sigh at him. “Twice a night. I couldn’t sleep unt-” 

“Would you do it again for me tonight?” He interrupts you. “Twice. Please.” 

“Okay.” 

You barely have time to think about what’s going to happen before Mando is up on his feet, holding his hand out to you. You stare up at him for a moment, not recognizing  the gesture especially from him. You place your hand in his eventually and he pulls you to your feet. Then, he holds your hand as you begin to walk inside. 

“Are there rules about..” You trail off as you get to the ship's entrance. You stop walking. “Are you not allowed to, you know, touch me like that?” You ask as he turns to see why you’ve stopped. 

“No.” He says quietly now that you’re both within earshot of the child again. 

“So why don’t you help me tonight?” You ask hesitantly unsure of how he’ll react. He takes a step towards you so fast you take a step back in fear but he pulls you into him gently. 

“You’d let me? Really?” He asks, surprised, like you weren’t just splayed out at his request a couple nights ago. 

Yes?” You say confused. “Why do you think I said yes the other night?” Mando doesn’t speak. For so long. Again with the silence Maker.

“I don’t know.” 

“You’re impossible. Do you know that?” You ask, rolling your eyes at him. 

“I’ll help.” He says, taking a step backward onto the ramp of the ship. “I can do more than help, too. If you’d let me.” 

“Let you? Like I don’t want it either.” You chuckle to yourself. 

“You really thought about it? About me?” He asks in a hushed whisper as you walk into the ship and you place your new gift in a cupboard high enough that the child can't reach. Once you’re fully into the hull he shuts everything up. You’re starting to undress, Mando has disappeared somehow, he was just in front of you, and you turned to check on the child and now he’s gone. The ship goes completely dark, just like the other night and you’re plunged into the void once again.

“Mando.” You whisper into the abyss. “Mando I don’t like wh-” But you feel his hands.

You didn’t even hear him walk to you, only feeling his hands on your waist. Mando slips two fingers behind the button of your pants and then with his thumb, pops it open. You can’t even comprehend how he did that before his touch is gone again.

“Do you have to keep the beskar on all the time?” You whisper. He’s disappeared from touching you so you start to unbutton the front of your shirt. But then his un-gloved hands move yours away. 

“Do you think I sleep in it?” He teases from behind the modulator. 

“Yeah, kinda.” You respond honestly because why would you not think that? You’ve never even seen Mandos' wrist or ankle. To you, his beskar may as well be a part of him. Something he physically cannot remove. 

He does the laugh again. 

“Do you want me to take it off?” He asks after a moment of silence. He’s undoing your buttons so slowly. 

“If you take it off, am I– am I allowed to touch you?” He doesn’t respond but he’s finally got all your buttons undone and now he’s sliding his hands where your shirt opens in the middle and he’s sliding the flat of his palm across the skin just below your breasts. He groans softly. 

“You want to t-touch me?” He asks, like he cannot believe that you’d want to do that. 

“Yes!” It’s louder than you intended. You put your hands over your mouth because the child is close by. “Yes. You don’t want to just touch each other?” You whisper now.

“No.” He says quickly. “I me– I mean yes. But I want to watch you too. I like doing that. You’re very– v-very… You know how you like to be touched. I want you to show me.” The raspiness of his modulated voice is making your knees weak. 

“Okay.” Is all you can come up with; it’s your favorite word apparently. You wonder if Mando can sense that all the thoughts in your brain just leave when he says things like that to you.

You hear the soft metal clicks of something being set on the floor beside you and now, your heart is racing. He’s a real person under his armor and cape and helmet and you’re about to touch him. Standing in the dark waiting for Mando to disarm himself for you. Your heart is pounding out of your chest, you’re sure that Mando can hear it or he probably had a sensor for it in his helmet, since it’s so  useful to him all the damn time. 

“Touch.” He whispers. You hesitantly reach your hands into the darkness and your fingers brush up against the hottest skin you’ve ever touched. It’s like he’s being incubated inside the beskar. So warm. So… strong . His skin is soft on your fingertips but he’s got muscles under there. You can feel them. You press into him, making sure he’s real because this has got to be a dream.

“Wow.” You manage to whisper in awe into the dark. You’re impressed with how he feels behind your hands, yes, so impressed it’s making your legs tingle again. It’s also nice to feel another person against you again. He’s so inviting now that his armor is off. Now that he’s exposed it’s like a different person is standing in front of you.

You press the flat of your palm against his sides, feeling his ribcage against your hands. Fingers still pressed tightly against his flesh so you can feel him.  

He’s breathing heavily and you’re so close you can hear him under the modulator. 

“You want to keep that on?” You ask, looking up to where the breathing is coming from. He says nothing. “It’s okay if you do, I just wanna make sure you’re comfortable.” You snake your hands around his waist and run them up the length of his back and he’s got even more rock hard muscles back there, Maker, how? He’s like one big rock hard bag of muscles and it’s incredible to feel his strength under your hands this way.

“I’d prefer to see you.” 

You’re pressing your own naked body against his now, the hard peak of your breasts press against him and you feel him shiver against you. 

“I like looking at you.” He rasps quietly. His hands touch you. Really touch you. His flat palms are running down your sides. He started up under your arm and is slowly dragging his hands down your waist and sides. Mapping you out. Taking in every inch of you. 

“I like when you touch me.” You whisper. When you speak, he presses the tips of each finger into your flesh and gropes you gently. 

Maker, the strength behind his touch is almost debilitating. It’s incredible and you feel bad for anyone he’s ever put his hands on in any way that isn’t this because he’s holding back for you. You can feel it, in the tenseness of his arms as your hands now explore his forearms and biceps and triceps. Mando is so tense he’s almost shaking. Like he’s desperately holding back from just grabbing you, tossing you on the bed and not listening or watching you like before. 

You’re obsessed with it, the way he’s breathing while he’s touching and exploring your body. It’s staggered and sometimes, when his hands will roam across your ass or your breasts, he’ll gasp softly like he was surprised. You wish on everything that was good, Maker, that he’d just take the helmet off. You’d do anything to just feel the warmth of his mouth where his hands are right now.

Mando takes both of his hands and lifts you right below your bottom, and lifts so your feet are just barely touching the floor. You have to hold onto his shoulders to keep from falling and your whole body presses into him for support. Mando sighs softly into your ear from behind the modulator before he starts to walk you backwards. You're on just the tips of your toes and you let him guide you to his bed. 

It's not much better than the mat. But it's off the floor and has a little more padding. And the blankets, oh Maker, the blankets are so soft. You’ve slept in them naked the past two nights because they’re the most beautiful feeling on your skin while you twist and turn in your sleep. 

Now, Mando is laying you down on top of them. As he lays you down, he kicks either one of your knees open with his so he can kneel between them, he’s still leaning you back, moving one hand to behind your neck so you don’t fall. 

“I like this better than the doodles .” He says as you finally lay back, his hand slides from behind your neck and over your collar bone slowly. He snakes it around your fleshy mound and between your breasts, still pressed flat against you. “S-so much better.” It’s a sigh through the modulator but you can tell he’s watching his hand trail down between your breasts and over your stomach.

“You can look whenever you want.” You tell him breathlessly as his hand moves across your stomach. His index finger traces over your bellybutton so lightly it almost tickles but this is too erotic to be laughing and squirming from tickles. You are squirming but it’s because he’s still tracing over your belly button but his other hand has found where your thigh meets your hip. Now he’s touching you so close to where you want to be touched but his fingers trace across your lower stomach and he sighs again.

“Do you mean it?” His raspy modulator makes you jump because he’s been quiet for so long. You forgot what you said, it's been so long. He’s been teasing you with his fingers like this for what feels like twenty minutes. 

“Mean what?” You sigh as the back of his hand grazes over your slit. You’re already soaked. If you could think about anything besides how fucking hot this was, you’d be a little embarassed getting to excited for someone who hasn’t even kissed you. 

“I can look whenever?” Mando rests the back of his hand against you and pushes his middle finger into your slit. “Because I would like to. I’d look all the time.” His finger is pushing against your clit gently and it’s sending blaster beams through you. 

“Yes. I m-meant it.” You gasp softly into the dark. The heat of his hand feels like it’s going to burn right through you. 

Mando flips his hand around and cups your sex and pushes. The pressure from your own fold and his hand make you moan softly. Now he massages you, slowly and you assume he watches as he makes you squirm again. You suppress another moan as he increases his pressure and almost pushes you back a little, his massaging getting a little fast. 

“I like watching you try and hold back.” His raspy voice behind the modulator scares you again in the dark after a bout of silence and slow crescendoed increases in his speed of his rubbing. Then he pulls his hands away. You snap your knees up to trap him so he can’t leave and you feel his naked body against your inner thighs and it makes you sigh softly because he is so warm and so inviting as his hands find your legs. He’s gripping you. 

“Don’t leave.” You whine, squeezing him tighter between your legs. You hear him chuckle, a real chuckle and his hands relax and he slides them up to your middle. 

“How could I? You’ve ensnared me.” And then his hands slide up your waist and you can feel him leaning over you. “I won’t leave. Not now.” He whispers to you, his hands now just under your breasts. “I have to touch you.” Mando’s hands slide across your fleshy mounds and he gropes them gently in his palms. Squeezing them. “P-perfect.’ 

“Don’t stop.” You reach up and place your hands on top of his and make him squeeze them harder. “F-feels so good, Mando.” One of your nipples slips between his fingers and he pinches it unknowingly as he gropes and massages. He’s following your lead, feeling the pressure you put on his hands and he mirrors it. “Sss- so- oh shit, Mando.” 

Mando has pressed his erection against your slit, but not inside. You feel the length of him pressed between your legs. 

“Fuck.” He groans through the modulator. “You’re s-so wet already.” The cold metal of the helmet is on your shoulder. “Fuck.” He moves now, slowly and his entire length moves between your folds, the ridges and veins of him moving against your clit. Your hands are still holding his to your chest. “You’re exquisite.” He rasps into your ear quietly. 

“O-oh M-maker.” You moan softly but he pulls away from you, his entire body jerks back. 

“No.” He exhales loudly. “I want to watch you, first.” Like he just remembered that’s what you came here for originally. 

You’re a mess below him and before he can even finish speaking your hands are in between your legs. You’re working yourself in every way you can for him, if he wants to watch you’re going to give him a show. 

Quickly and easily you have two fingers inside you curling and uncurling against your wetness and your other hand is spinning tight circles around your clit. It’s so sensitive it’s not going to take long to get you there. You hear him moan softly in the darkness and his hand holds on to one of your knees that are still resting by his side. 

“Yes, oh y-yes. Little one, d-does that feel good?” He coos down to you. You hear him speak and your fingers are working faster. They’re trying hard to make him want to touch you again. 

“Yes, so g-good.” You moan, the circles getting tighter as he continues to speak down to you.

“Keep going, little one. I’ve been thinking about the sounds you make when you do it.” He grips your knee a little tighter and with the other hand pushes your legs open a little further. “S-so lovely.” 

And then you give him what he’s been waiting for. It starts in your toes this time and you curl them, pressing your feet hard into the bed as your hips lift– either to let him see better or because the feeling is just so fucking good that it’s making you levitate– and he sighs loudly. 

The wetness between your legs and your little choked sobs of bliss are the only sounds in the ship as you come with him kneeling before you. Mando’s grip on your knees tightens as your fingers continue to move around your clit and curl inside of you. He’s listening and watching and you love it. It makes you come harder.

“Mando.” You whimper softly. You wish you could see him. “Fuck.” It’s a strained through another gasp of pleasure. 

“Can I touch it?” He asks so politely. You nod, panting and letting your head fall back again after looking up into the darkness for him. 

Mando’s fingers leave one of your knees and he’s at your entrance. He’s pushing two fingers into you gently and then he pulls away. He does it several more times before you realize what he’s doing. 

“You taste so good.” He whispers but the rasp of his modulator is gone and it’s just a man speaking to you now in the dark. Your heart almost explodes in your chest because it’s exactly what you imagined it would sound like. You try to keep your composure. Then you feel his hands on the back of your thighs and the warm breath – oh Maker it’s so warm– your lower stomach. 

Mando is kissing you. He’s trailing kisses along your stomach and stops at your belly button. He kisses it gently and trails his tongue around the outside of it like he had earlier with his fingers. You’re trembling, biting your lip and clenching your fists to your sides because this is the most incredible non orgasm feeling you’ve ever felt and Mando is the one doing it to you.

His tongue traces your belly button as his hands trail up the back of your thighs and find the bend in your knee. He pushes your legs up gently and the tip of his tongue dips into your belly button for just a moment before he’s planting kisses down your stomach. 

“Much b-better than just w-w-watching, huuh?” You stumble out as he bites and nips at the skin on your inner thighs. 

“If I can make you do what you did, yes.” Then his mouth is on you. Theres no hesitation, no teasing. Just his lips pressed against your slit and he’s parting you with his tongue. 

“Oh.” You weren’t expecting it. Everything’s had such a big build up that you were expecting this to go on until the sun came up but he’s licking and lapping at your still sensitive clit. 

“You,” He whispers against your slit. “-taste incredible.” 

“Can I touch your hair?” You pant. Your hands have been searching for something to hold onto and grasp and tug at in pleasure but you’ve been too nervous to touch him anywhere since he took his helmet off. 

Mando is quiet for a long time and he’s stopped licking you. He’s still holding your knees up to your chest. 

“It’s okay if I can’t, I just wanted-” You start rambling nervously into the dark because you’re scared he’s gonna back away and tell you to go sleep on your mat on the floor. 

“I think that’d be okay.” He says after so painstakingly long. You sigh and let your head fall back again in relief. 

Tentatively you reach for him, unsure of where he is in the dark. Your hand brushes his shoulder and you rest your fingers against him and trail them up his neck. His hair is thick and coarse and you just know it’s dark hair. You can feel it in your soul as your fingers curl in it. 

As your fingers find their grip, he goes back to licking you. He has no real meaning behind his movements with his tongue. You’re semi disappointed but you come to realize that he’s exploring. Mando wants to know every inch of you and he’s taking his time. 

His hair feels so good between your fingers. You pull and tug on it gently every time he presses the flat of his tongue against you and slides upwards. He’s licking you like you are his sweet treat, his dessert. 

“I like that.” He says suddenly. You’ve been laying on your back, you moved one of your feet to his shoulder and have his hands tangled in hair still. He’s been lapping at you leisurely for an unknown amount of time. You haven't complained at all, it’s heavenly, Maker, heavenly. 

“What?” You ask breathlessly. You care what he likes but you wish he would keep his mouth on you. You never want him to stop. It’s incredible how thorough he is with his tongue. 

“Your hands. In my hair.” He’s back to your middle now but there’s meaning behind his movements now, like your voice ignited something in him, maybe, you don’t care. You let your head fall back and your grip tightens in his hair again and you push him against you gently, letting him know you need him there. 

Mando loves it, he lets you know he loves it by increasing those perfect circles around your clit and then he moans. That moan sends vibrations through you that you didn’t know were possible. They’re head spinning. 

This is when he decides it’s a good time to add two fingers into the mix. He pushes his ring and middle fingers into you while his tongue swirls quickly. Instead of curling his fingers, he angles them upwards slightly and then pulls them back out and drags the pads of them along the spot inside you. 

You arch your back and tug at his hair harder because this is the best feeling, this right here. You’ve never been able to make yourself feel this way. You didn’t even think pleasure like this way possible. 

“Mando.” You whimper quietly. 

“Din.” He moans against you. You’re so confused because what’s a Din? Why is he saying that.

“What?” You ask in bliss filled confusion. “What did you say?” You lift your head to look up at him but it’s still dark and you can’t see.

“Say Din. It’s my name.” His tongue is back on you and your head falls back and you can’t even be excited that he’s just told you his name because his fingers, Maker, his fingers.

They’re thrusting into you; hard enough to make you shake every time he drives them forward and his tongue hasn’t stopped moving in just the perfect way. 

“Din.” You whimper and clench your eyes shut. Your fingers are gripped so tightly in his hair you’re sure you’ll still have some in between your knuckles when he’s done. “Din. P-please don’t stop.” You have to whisper but you’re holding back a moan that would wake the child and you’re just so desperate for release that you’d die from frustration if the child did wake up.

Din’s fingers move faster, he knows, he’s so ready to feel you come on him that he’s panting against your clit as he laps at you.

“Ohh Din.” It’s drawn out in a long moan whisper as you feel it wash over you. This time it’s radiating out of you from your middle and your hips start to rock against his mouth– they’ve been still this whole time– but this orgasm makes you pitch and reel against him because it’s just so fucking good. It’s mind numbing. One hand leaves his hair because you need to cover your mouth and nose to stop from moaning. 

Din doesn’t stop, he keeps going as your walls contract and restrict against his fingers. It’s making him work harder and his tongue is lashing against you because the feeling of you gushing against his hand is a new feeling to both of you.

“Fuck, Din.” You whimper as the sensation now becomes too much. You twitch with every touch of his tongue and your legs clamp around his head in disapproval of his touch.

Din doesn’t move for a couple seconds and then, from muffled between your legs you hear him. 

“You’ve ensnared me… again.” You laugh because you really have. You open your legs and he leans up and kisses along your stomach. “Can I do what we did the other night?” He asks impatiently.

“You don’t want my help?” You inquire knowingly. He says nothing back but you hear him, hear his fist on himself and then he’s stealing your wetness to do it.

“N-no.” He grunts out softly. “No, lay back. P-please. Lay back.” 

You do. But you feel weird about it. Like does he not want you to touch him? He seemed excited when you said you wanted to touch him earlier but he’s being different now. You lay there, legs still bent at the knee and spread around Din’s body. 

He slips his hands between your legs to take more of your wetness. 

“Th-th-this is what I-I thought about.” He groans out quietly but the modulation is back. “I want to w-watch and-and I–” But he cuts himself off and you hear him moan quietly. Then he’s leaning over you again, you feel his hand rest beside your head. You reach up and wrap your hand around his wrist gently while he comes on your belly. “So good. It’s so good, Little one.” And then he’s resting the cool metal of the helmet against your shoulder. He rests there for a while, letting you keep your hand on his wrist. 

You grab his hand when he pulls away and bring the tips of his fingers to your lips and kiss them softly. 

“Let me next time.” You whisper and slip one of his fingers into your mouth and swirl your tongue around it gently. “Can you see this?” You ask with the tip of his finger between his lips. He says nothing but you can hear his modulated breathing still. 

“Yes.” He says softly. “Let me clean you up.” He says, but he doesn’t pull his hand away.

“Feed it to me.” You say, licking the tops of his fingers gently. 

“Wh-what?” He stutters at your question. 

“Let me taste you, feed it to me.” Your tongue and lips are still teasing his fingers and with his other hand you feel him swirl two fingers in the pool he shot into your belly button. He brings them to your mouth and you move your mouth to those fingers instead. He moves his saliva coated fingers down to your stomach and picks up more of himself on that hand and puts them into your mouth when you pull away from his other hand. He does that until there’s nothing left. Neither of you say anything the entire time. You just do it. When his searching fingers can find no more you feel him sit back. 

“You like that?” He asked quietly in the dark. 

“Only yours.” You whisper back, laying with your hands behind your head. “You can clean me up now.” You tease. He eases himself off the bed and you also start to ease yourself off the bed but you feel him stop.

“What are you doing?” He asks softly. 

“I’m going to go back to my bed,” You say because why wouldn’t you? The bed he has isn’t very big and it’s also not very comfortable besides the sheets. 

“Why?” He asks. “You don’t want to sleep here?” 

“With you?” You ask suspiciously. He says nothing in the darkness. It’s quiet for so long. Then a damp cool cloth on your belly is wiping you down, getting everything he spread out across you in his search for more to put into your mouth. Dips the rag into your belly button. You’re waiting for him to respond. “Mando?” He pulls away from you.

“I said call me Din.” He rasps from the darkness. 

You had almost forgotten but really, you were too scared. What if it was just only while you had your clothes formality.

“Din, you wanna share the bed?” You inquire nervously. More silence.

“I– I could sleep on the mat.” It sounds like a question but it isn’t. He sounds a little disappointed. 

“No, you sleep on the bed. I’m gonna sleep on the mat.” You nod your head into the dark and go to get your nightgown.

“Not share?” He grabs you by the upper arm as you try to pass him. 

“No. Not share. It’s too small.” You look up and wonder if he’s looking down at you. He releases your arm and you go back to your mat. It’s cool down here now and you feel refreshed. It’s hot underneath Mand- Din. It’s hot. He’s a hot man, 

You get yourself tucked into bed and wonder if he’ll be there in the morning when you wake up or if you’ll be in the stars once more. You’ve been in this same field for four whole days. It’s starting to look boring. You need a change of scenery. So does the child. He didn’t make a whole sound th-. You sit up suddenly

“Din!” You exclaim quietly. You hear something bang against metal and he groans. “Sorry.” 

“What?” He grumbles, no raspy modulation.

“The kid! I haven't heard him once since we turned the lights off, is he in the bassinet?” You’re sweating now and every good feeling you’ve had inside of you just two minutes ago is gone. You hear him bang again on something metal and then he’s at the bassinet. 

“Shit. I have to get my hel-” He shuffles back to where he came from, you hear him, no metal banging this time and then the light comes on and you’re blinded . 

What was once a void, a terrible darkness you didn’t think was possible is ripped from you and then you are plunged into the brightest lights you’ve ever seen. You raise your hand, trying to shield them from the light above you but you’re not concerned with that. You stumble to your feet and look into the empty orb. 

“No.” You mutter and look around. “Nonononononononoo.” You whine, the sweat starts to bead in the center of your back. “Where is he? The ship’s not that big, where could he be?” You look at Mando for the first time since the lights came on. He’s got his helmet and just black pants. You stare at him for a long time, forgetting what you were so worked up over because he doesn’t look like your doodles. He’s muscular, yes very but there is a softness your doodles are lacking. He’s got shape and curves and valleys to his body and it’s beautiful.

The child.

“Fuck!” You exclaim. “We would have heard the door? Right?” You start to search, every little crevice and door or cupboard you can think of. He’s nowhere.

“He’s still in here.” Din says, looking around much more carefully and less destructive as you are. 

“How do you know? He’s so small Din, what if something happ-” But he shoots his head over at you in a way that steals the words from your mouth. 

“Don’t. He’s still here. I just know.” Then he goes back to looking. 

You two look everywhere for what feels like way too long and finally Din calls to you. 

“I’ve got him.” 

You’re on your hands and knees almost inside the engine  of the ship, a place you have no reason being because you don’t know what goes on inside, just that there was a space big enough for the child to climb through. 

You relax. You can breathe. He’s got the child. Everything is right in the world. 

Making your way back to the room, you wipe off your hands and knees and fix your messy hair because you’ve just been on the floor, crawling around on your hands and knees like an animal. When the child sees you, he reaches for you and you take him gently from Din’s arms. 

“Where were you? Huh? Scared me half to death thinking I lost you.” You cradle him close to you. “Where was-” Din is looking your way with your brand new notebook in his hands. All the pages have been torn apart or chewed on. “How did you even get up there?” You look down at the child who is already sleepily blinking up at you. “How do you do stuff like that?” You rub his forehead with your index finger and he closes his eyes slowly.

“I’ll get you another one. Two.” Din tosses the notebook back into the cupboard. “Sorry.” 

“You didn’t put him in that cupboard… did you ?” You tease quietly now that the kid’s back to sleep. You go to put him in his bassinet but Din stops you.

“Sleep in the bed. With him. Don’t let him sneak around like that again tonight. I’ll sleep on the mat.” Before you can protest he's got his hands on your shoulders, guiding you to the bed. “Please. I feel bad you’ve been sleeping on the floor. I’ll get you a better mat.” 

So you crawl into bed and Din goes to turn the light out. The sheets are so soft. You place the child beside you and curl your body around his. You’ll feel if he decides he wants another paper snack or a midnight stroll around the ship. 

“How do you sleep down here?” Din says with almost no expression from your place on the floor. 

You chuckle and snuggle into the child.

Tag list (I'm putting anyone who showed me love and interest in this story, tell me to fuck off and I'll remove you if you'd like) @glitterymanboy @pedrospookie @thereaperisabitch @furiousmushroom

I'll also add whoever wants me to add them!

[witchygagirlwrites]

That Damn Chain

Jay Halstead x Reader

In which you blurt out things in the heat of the moment and reveal some things about yourself and feelings you'd buried for one of your partners

NSFW happenings

How was it that you and Jay had yet again drawn the short straw to go undercover? You loved your partner but you were so damn tired of playing arm candy. The last three undercover ops you'd been dolled out and while normally you would've loved the occasion pampering the fact remained you hated not being able to have a weapon of any sorts on you. That left not only yourself unguarded but Jay's back as well should something go south.

You knew without a shadow of a doubt he’d protect you with his life, same as you him but if something happened where you walked away and he didn’t because he was protecting you? You weren’t sure of a scenario that would end well. No matter how hard you tried to deny it to yourself your partner had won your heart quite a while ago. You’d never admit it under threat of torture. Too much bad waters for him when it came to partners and too much to lose for you when he undoubtedly didn’t feel the same.

“Kim!” you flinched when she poked your eye with the eyeliner and she grimaced “I’m sorry honey!” Voight had lent you his office to get ready considering it had an actual locking door but it also didn’t have a mirror so you had to rely on her help with makeup and hair. You let a small smile slip onto your face “Didn’t hurt as bad as Adam getting the wire tangled in my hair the last time” she cracked a grin at the memory of you chasing him through the tech room and threatening to wax his beard off.

You and Jay were due at the club around ten to meet with Alex Henderson. A tycoon's son with too much money and not enough morals. He’d gotten bored partying it up with small-time drugs and hookers and moved onto trafficking heroin, fentanyl and as of late people. You just needed to get him on tape making a sale and you’d have him for it all. Jay was set up through a C.I, to meet with Alex. Poe was a former friend of Alex’s and when he’d gotten rolled up for suspicion in his girlfriend’s death when she overdosed he’d cut a deal to avoid the death sentence.

“There, you’re ready” she replied after a moment and you smiled. Your breasts felt like they were directly under your chin with how high the combination of a push up bra and corseted top accented them. The skirt you wore barely skimmed your thighs and as for the boots, you’d arrested actual hookers wearing more. “Do I at least get a jacket?” you groaned and she held up the long coat. At least it looked warm “It’s lined” she added as if she was reading your face so you smiled “You’re an angel Kim”

About that time there was a knock on the door followed by Voight asking if you were ready. You cut your eyes at Kim and took a deep breath before walking out. Hailey let out a low whistle “Damn Y/N” you winked at her “From you? I’ll take the catcall”

Adam looked at Kim with wide eyes “Those are a bit…much”  Kevin and Jay walked around the corner and both stopped dead in their tracks. “Jesus” Jay muttered under his breath and Kevin grinned before slapping his shoulder “C’mon Jay. That’s your partner man. Am I the only professional around here?” 

You were too busy practically drooling over what Jay was wearing. He was wearing a suit, tailored to hug his shoulders and the gold chain Will had given him for his last birthday peeking out the collar. After the last time he got shot he swore it was a good luck charm and wore it however often he could. That damn chain was a hazard to your health. The thoughts it caused to pop into your head were never rated to be having about a coworker. 

You plastered a smile on “Kim wired me up. If everyone is through admiring my cleavage can we please get this show on the road?” Voight chuckled “You heard the woman, lets get it done”

You walked into the club next to Jay. He had one arm tucked around your waist, fingers rubbing small circles onto your hip. You noticed he did that anytime you were supposed to be his girl undercover and it made you wonder if that was something he actually did or if it was just a thing to keep him in the mindset of the moment.

You covered his hand with yours and squeezed gently. “You ok Johnny?" you cut your eyes up at him and he smiled “Yeah baby, I’m good” your heart flipped anytime he had to call you baby or sweetheart or darling on these things. You knew they didn’t mean anything more than your false name at the moment.

—---------

Alex stood outside the V.I.P. section with two thick necked guards “Mr Reynolds!” Jay laughed “Man, call me Johnny. Only my old man goes by Mr Reynolds” the two shook then Alex looked at you “And the lovely Gwen is with you I see” Jay pulled you into his side “Always”

Alex motioned behind him “Let’s grab a drink and talk”. You felt Jay’s hand slip into yours as the two of you followed him and the guards. 

When you got to a booth Alex purposely sat where you’d have no choice but to sit next to him. Jay met your eyes before reaching a hand out, you took it and he pulled you down into his lap “Always been your favorite seat, right baby?” you smiled “Always Johnny" he looked over at Alex “Now, lets talk”

The teams’ voices through the com in your ear was your only grounding factor against the fire raging in your core every time Jay slightly shifted his leg. Did he fucking realize what he was doing?  His hand slipped down to gently squeeze your ass all the while never missing a beat at backing Alex into the corner all of you needed him in. You bit down hard enough on your bottom lip that you tasted blood to be able to focus.

You knew the moment the sale was made the unit would come in along with the uniforms waiting around the block to not only clear the club of civilians but to make sure none of Alex’s business partners showed up. “So what are we thinking here? Six kilos and five girls?” Alex said and you heard Voight give the order to surround the club.

—------------

Jay cut his eyes at you as he pulled you down next to him, effectively shielding your body with his. “Yeah” “That's a hefty price you sure you got it?” Alex pushed and Jay stood up, pulling you with him “Look man if you don’t want the money just say so”  “I didn’t say that. I’m just asking if you’ve got that funds for that much heroin and that many girls. It ain't cheap to bring either product in and I don’t want to lose my invested time and money and from the looks of it you put enough money into Gwen here, I mean if you wanna offer a trade” 

Alex took a step towards you and Jay stepped squarely in front of you “If you want to draw another breath you wont even finish that thought” “Point taken” Alex chuckled then looked at his guards “I gotta make some calls. Treat them well”

—-----------

When Alex left Jay eyed the guards then whispered “Go with it” he grabbed your hand and winked at the guard “We’ll be back fellas” the guards eyed the two of you so he slipped his hand down to grab your ass again and you gasped lightly then giggled to cover it up. The guards chuckled “Bathroom is down the hall” 

“What was that?” you asked and he whispered “I think we’re made. He may not be thinking cops but he knows something is up” “Do we need to come in?” Voight asked over the coms about the time the two of you made it to the bathroom. You’d just closed the door when the first bullets hit just above your head before Jay tackled you to the ground, covering your body with his.

“CHICAGO POLICE DEPARTMENT” you heard ringing out from around the club. Jay pulled his gun from his lower back and slowly crouched over you, his chain slipping free of his shirt to dangle in front of your face as he asked “Are you ok?” you weren’t sure what the hell came over you but when you looked up into those blue eyes after such a burst of adrenaline with that damn chain dangling you blurted out “I’ve had a few dreams in this position but they never started with us getting shot at”

His eyes widened before a grin slipped onto his face “Either you’re fine or delirious. We’ll figure that out later” he pulled your backup from where he’d carried it in on his left ankle and pressed it into your hand. At your questioning look he shrugged “You hate not having a weapon nearby” then pulled you to your feet so you could both go out and meet your unit.

 For the next few days you barely looked Jay in the eye, hoping like hell he had forgotten the dream comment. Maybe he’d chalk it up to weird shit people said when adrenaline hit?

You should’ve known better when Friday night found you at Mollys. You were talking to Ethan and April at the bar while Stella made your drink. The week had been a little crazy so you were happy to relax. 

You knew the presence anywhere the moment a hand slipped around your waist “Hey partner” you cut your eyes up “Hey Halstead” he nodded to April and Ethan before passing a twenty over your head to Stella to pay for your drink and his own beer. He leaned down close enough, his breath caused a shiver to run through you when he whispered “Can we talk?”

You nodded, thanking Stella for your drink and telling April you’d see her later. Jay kept his hand at your lower back as the two of you walked over to a booth in the far corner. You slid in and cut your eyes up at him “Is this you making fun of me? Because if so I swear..” he grinned “No, this is me asking about those dreams”

You raised an eyebrow and he shrugged “What was I doing?” you leaned across the table to flick that damn chain out of his shirt before saying “Well that thing was dangling in my face for an entirely different reason besides you tackling me to keep me from getting shot” he damn near choked on his beer at that.

You laughed “Jay, chill. It’s no big deal. People have weird sex dreams. Doesn’t mean anything” his eyes flicked up to yours “So you don’t have any feelings for me? Because it’s been hard as hell acting like I don’t have feelings for you” “What?” you asked, sitting your drink down on the table.

He grinned and leaned over to grab your hand “I’ve wanted you for so damn long but because of my past relationship with a partner..” you shrugged “Just because you and her didn’t work out doesn’t mean anything” he stared at you for a moment before saying “I want you so damn much but I don’t want to rush things” you smiled slightly “Well in our job we could get killed tomorrow?” 

He shook his head but that smile he gave you was nothing short of gorgeous “Are you trying to get me in bed?” you took a sip of her drink then nodded “Yeah, I am” he nodded then took a swig of his beer before standing up “Just making sure” and grabbed your hand.

“You’re sure about this?” Jay asked as the two of you stumbled into his apartment, barely breaking away from each other long enough to make it inside the door and get it closed behind you before he had you pushed back against it as his mouth worked the sensitive skin of your neck.

You gasped when he hit a particular spot, hands digging into the material of his shirt “I’m sure. Take your damn shirt off Jay” he pulled away from you and grinned “You’re always so bossy” before slipping his shirt over his head and tossing it. You pushed him back from you a little and he looked concerned until you smiled and ran your hands over his chest “Fuck Halstead” you couldn’t help but to be a little dumbfounded at having him in front of you like this. He grinned “I’m yours” and pulled you back into his arms, dropping another kiss to your lips before tugging you towards his bedroom. “I think you said something about wanting to be in a position with my chain dangling in your face?” you fucking whimpered in response and he chuckled “Oh I’m gonna have fun with you baby. You make such sweet sounds to be so mean to me at work”

He walked backwards into the room and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling you down into his lap. You straddled him and just the way he looked up at you could’ve made you come apart. His hands went to the hem of your shirt “Can I take this off?” you pulled it off yourself and tossed it across the room. He smiled “Look at you. Looks even better than that damn top was showing” his mouth lowered to your clothed chest, kissing across the soft mounds of flesh “What’s better is only I get to see you like this”

He reached behind you and slipped your bra off with ease before his hands came up to cup your breasts. “Damn” you moaned lightly at just how gentle he was being, like he was afraid you’d break.  One hand left your breast to slip around your throat, not applying pressure just controlling your attention. “If we do this baby, know it means I’m yours and you’re mine. I don’t share well” 

You nodded and he shook his head “Words baby, I need words” “I’m yours Jay” you spoke and he leaned forward, just shy of kissing you before saying “Damn right you are” he turned, flipping the two of you so your back was on the bed and he was on top of you. Your eyes flicked down to his chain and he chuckled “Does that turn you on?” you nodded and he grinned “It’s turned you on the whole time I’ve had it, hasn’t it?”

“It has” you admitted and he grinned before catching your lips in a bruising kiss. He moved from your lips, across your jaw then down your neck. The stark comparison of the warmth of his lips with the cool metal of the chain had you squirming under him. One of his hands went to your hips, pinning them.

He kissed across your chest, taking his time to mark both breasts “So everyone knows they’re his” when he got to your jeans he looked up at you and winked before slipping them off your hips. He started at your left ankle, kissing up and stopping just shy of where you needed him before giving the right leg the same treatment.

Just when you were sure you’d die from teasing he licked one long stripe through your folds and when your hips bucked up and fingers went to his hair he kissed your inner thigh and said “That’s my girl” before diving in.

—------------------

You’d had men go down on you before but Jay was an entirely different story. The way his tongue worked at your clit, fingers finding their way inside of you to move in tandem as he worked you over that edge back to back until you were pushing at his shoulders begging him “Please Jay! It’s too much”

When he pulled back to look at you he smiled before kissing your trembling thighs “How ya feeling?” you curled a finger at him and his smile turned into a full blown smirk as he kissed his way up your body before finally making it to your mouth, letting you taste yourself on him.

You could feel his hard cock pressing on your thigh so you spread your legs a little further to give him the invitation. He pressed his forehead against yours as he moved one hand to line himself up with your opening before slowly slinking in. When he was finally bottomed out you both let out a moan. 

—------------------

He held himself up once he was sure you were ready and gave a tentative thrust.  When your response was to grip his shoulders he buried his face into your neck for just a breath before it was like a thought occurred to him. He pulled back and grabbed your hands then pulled them up over your head,holding them in place as his eyes met yours “I wanna see you fall apart” he grunted and you felt yourself clench around him. 

His eyes fluttered at the feeling “Just like that then huh baby?” he sat a rough pace that meant with each roll of his hips you could feel every ridge and vein of his cock as he pounded into you.  You were itching to touch him but he still held your hands, that damn chain in your face as he worked you closer and closer to that edge.

When his fingers found your clit and he started to rub tight circles onto it you felt that pressure that had been building inside of you burst and you came with a loud moan of his name. The feeling of your orgasm pushed him over the edge as well, burying himself inside of you with one final thrust.

He finally released your hands as he buried his face in the bend of your neck, both of you working to get your breathing back to normal. Your hands went to his shoulders, smoothing down the muscles as your lips kissed any skin you could reach. 

He laughed lightly and leaned up to press a kiss to your lips “A damn chain got us to admit how we felt” you shrugged and tapped it “I happen to like that damn chain” he looked down to where he was still buried hip deep in you “Yeah, I like it pretty good myself”

[theallianceofcelestials]

This took a while lol, sorry for that

So answer to first question: Eclipse, Sunpea, Moonpea, Puppet, Foxy and FC are there, tied to chairs like everyone else and later let out so they can enjoy the party. Moonpea was asked to help mentor Moonblock.

Solar, Lunar, Earth and Monty are weirded out, but Earth is at leasttrying to be supportive because this is her brother's wedding, while Solar's probably just trying to make sure everything's fine and Jack isn't misbehaving. Dazzle and Jack are picking flowers, because Sun didn't have a boquet on him, so they wanted to make him one. Lunar, who was continously trying to chew on Nexus's legs, does get told off for putting every dirty thing he sees in his mouth, so he stops.

The Astrals are flabbergasted as to how could something so trivial as rope tie them, they're made of literal light and whatever else, and yet, not even Taurus can get out. Sun does let them out with an apology later, and stops Taurus from flattening Nexus by telling him to wait until after the wedding party, because this is a joyous occasion. Taurus, who was pretty concerned about earth weddings before being told this wasn't normal, agrees.

Ruin is, as mentioned, tied next to Dark Sun and Nexus initially, and he wants out, wants to be free, to at the very least eat cake, but mainly to get away from Nexus. Sun, who's too flabbergasted to really realise what's going on, unties him first because he's the one to first ask. His legs aren't untied however until much later.

The Wither Dragon is also tied in the back row by rope, shaking and terrified out of its mind, and later during the party, Taurus nukes it, because it isn't family.

Well in the timeline part we're just before Chica introduction, so Sunblock is doing wonderfully mental healthwise (lies 👍😎), Moonblock is already in love with Sunblock and the reason he's crying is because he wanted to have a wedding with his Sun, but now he's seeing some other Sun's wedding, and with the way things are right now, it's gonna be a while til his own wedding. Monty and Foxy are still alive and still unpleasant, and also muzzled for the wedding so they can't spew bs. Bonnie who was there undercover as Eclipse's chef, as has been mentioned, is twitching on the floor half dead because of the shootout, shockgun, and Jack, which Solar looked away from. Roxy is just kind of there, unsure and weirded out (just like in canon). And Freddy is... Freddy. Aside from Freddy and later Sunblock, none of the MASM people get untied. Moonblock, who fell over during his crying fit, was set right up again, so bonus

I hope this answers your questions @bumblebeesbah ! Sorry I got around to them so late!

Now we got some extra part about the people, and a teeeny tiiiiny extra about the main wedding event, so (now featuring new infant sons Bloodblock), here are some things:

So originally the shootout and Moonblock's crying didn't happen, because this AU came to be before the Chica introduction video too, so we didn't have confirmed Moonblock crush, and also initially we tought it'd be amusing for Sun to encounter the MASM people after the wedding was done, and he was curious about this dimension's version of himself. So initially MASM people weren't even supposed to be on the wedding. And Trashcan man/Felix apparently, IS actually there on the wedding, next to the Creator, as freaked out by this weird creature as everyone else. He's just smart enough to keep his trap shut. Sun's first interaction with Bonnie was also supposed to happen when he went to check the dimension out, and Bonnie mistook him for Sunblock, and he was not having it. So he just essentially magic blasted him, and anyone else who wanted to try something. But then the idea of the shootout came, and it was too funny to pass up. And we also got Moonblock feelings confirmation, so from kinda implied maybe if you squint it levelled up to legit point in all of this. These are some extras for the event, little behind the scene and now deleted scenes, now onto newer stuff!

✨Future✨

Eclipseblock and Sun have two children, Dazzle and Sunblock, until one day, Sun comes home to a proud looking Eclipse being like "I made us new kids! :D" And it's freaking Bloodmoon.

So now Sun's saddled with this head-empty, only beetroot and blood version of one of his biggest traumas, his weird ass husband being weird, having to tell Dazzle she has new siblings, and stopping the inevitable attempt to bully Sunblock because bullying and stabbing and shooting other people in this dimension is normal apparently. He also has to try and teach this random maniac that was just born manners, and has to stop them from stabbing everything that moves. He's obviously very happy about that. Eclipseblock sleeps on the couch for at least a week

So they're living mostly in Sun's dimension, because he has an actual house and not just a rooftop, and also a job he can't opt out from, but Eclipseblock does take me time away by going on lone evil scheming trips. These are natural and good for them both.

It's Sun who cooks for everyone, being the only one to know how to, but he does show Eclispeblock how to make evil dino nuggies (they're regular dino nuggies but he drew evil eyebrows on the package. Like with everything else. He learned he needed to do this after the one time Eclipseblock slapped something out of his hands and burned it because it'd contaminate his beautiful precious husband's evil, and he doesn't want that. Needless to say, Sun doesn't take him shopping)

Unsurprisingly, after a while, Sun also needs a break. So he tells Eclipseblock he's taking Dazzle and they're leaving for a week to relax.

"No, we aren't divorcing and no, we aren't taking an actual break, don't worry"

"But-!"

"No buts! You go on your evil scheme trips, I'm going to a spa"

Despite his better judgement, he leaves Sunblock and Bloodblock with their 'papa', but makes sure to call every morning, and facetime them every night. So he knows they're still alive. And he texts the kids too, and less frequently Eclipseblock, because he is taking a bit of a break from his husband.

When he comes home, his husband is ecstatic, and is glued to his leg, and the kids are celebrating, Bloodblock glues themselves on his face and won't leave, while Sunblock is wrapped around his arm. It's Sunblock who raises concerns once Eclipse gathers himself and leaves to quickly fix something so he doesn't sleep on the couch, when he finally got his beloved back, and this is when Sunblock reveals that they've been eating nothing but warmed evil dino nuggies for the entire week, every single meal

To quote Bloodblock: "Some of them still had ice! :D"

And Sunblock actually went back to the plex to eat pizza, and you know it's bad, cuz he doesn't like the pizza there.

"They also ate a beetroot straight from the ground, with the dirt still on!" - ☀️🎲

Sun, horrified, gets his husband to the kitchen, because "Mandatory cooking lessons start today" and Eclipseblock terrified of the couch agrees. He's first taught how to make sandwiches. Sun by this point doesn't even care about the Minecraft logic of stabbing bread and getting (square) slices, he even utilises this ability when he cooks, mainly with animals.

They also make grilled cheese, because it's basically just a sandwich but fancy and heated. And kids love it.

Then they make frozen meatballs, this time he actually walks the guy step by step throught the process and tells him same goes for the nuggies too. He's not taking any chances.

Then they make pasta, spaghetti more specifically, because it's quick, it's easy, and kids love it. They don't make a sauce yet, instead opting with the italian hated method of put ketchup on it. In Bloodblock's case, beetroot and blood.

Sunblock and Bloodblock are overjoyed at the sight of real, actually cooked, not nuggies, food. Dazzle is just happy like always, and is excited to show her siblings photos of the vacation. And also her papa.

Dates mostly happen when Sun's least expecting them, when he's doing something and is yet again just agreeing with and complimenting his husband, because he DOES sometimes leave when he does that. But sometimes, similar to his wedding, he just blinks, and then is in a five star restaurant, in a different outfit, with Eclipseblock giving him his best seductive gaze, and fine wine being poured by a waiter/waitress already.

"Where are the kids?"

"Don't worry, Moon, Solar and Lunar are watching over them"

"..."

"Earth's there"

"Ah good, then there's an actual adult"

Moon and Solar meanwhile are blinking dumbfounded at Sunblock, Bloodblock, not at Dazzle who's there more. Bloodblock ends up breaking their knife on Moon, because of 'greeting him', by stabbing, and they're sad.

"What did Sun say about stabbing?"

"Not to do it"

"And what did you do?"

"Stab :("

"And what happened?"

"Our knife broke :'("

Dazzle is just playing with Sunblock and Jack, like good kids, with Earth watching over them. Lunar the deadbeat uncle is watching nutella ads. (I'm salty, nutella is not)

(I'll just mention here, Nexus is still alive at this point in time, he managed to escape from Taurus, though barely, and he's terrified by Eclipseblock. He gave up on the whole kidnap Sun thing. Ruin's probably also gone from there, already in EAPS dimension, cowering from Eclipseblock too probably. Dark Sun is ?, but he's doing that away from Eclipseblock too)

[velvetvexations]

It is so unbelievable how many fucking anti transmasc losers there are!! It's unbelievable, it really is just like ace discourse. Every fucking blog, I have to search 'transmasc' and 'TME' just like I had to search 'ace' and 'asexual' back in the day People will JUMP at the chance to do this shit over again huh

You should read up on the Cultural Revolution because it just keeps happening.

Ok not to double send but...

Blogs like yours do WONDERS for my mental health. Knowing there are actually people in my corner while I realise I'm a trans man is phenomenal

I'm glad to help! <3

my passing status is nebulous. sometimes i pass, but mostly i dont. im a trans guy with a thing for crossdressing so sometimes i have actual, legitimate euphoria vibes over just... sitting in my car and looking feminine. like "you all think im a girl but SECRETLY IM A BOY!!!" and it feels really good because like. yeah. i can look like a girl but nothing will change that i am a boy 😊😊 trans guy crossdresser again, my passing status is also really weird because i am intersex. my mustache confuses people, and that's great

That's similar to how I feel. People think I'm misgendering myself when I call myself male but it's more like I'm asserting dominance over gendered expectations lol. I'm male and I'm still a woman anyway.

thank you for your blog. a musician i really respected went super anti-transmasc recently and its really hurt, and the stuff here makes me feel like. less insane for having an issue with it

I'm really, really sorry anon. I love you a lot. <3

love that this person is calling people who believe that trans men can be oppressed "chuds", a word that is mostly used to talk about right-wing conservative men

transandro reactionaries dontcha know

"internet tough guys" still exist in 2024?????????????

Someone said something like "no one wants to fight you" and I was thinking "no actually I'm dead serious I would actually."

anyone who tries to debunk transandrophobia by throwing in "you people" has automatically lost the argument imo. but also I need to rant. as That Guy in your inbox who hangs out in bear and leather bars it makes me genuinely want to chew through the floor when people are like "oh well queer people don't demonize masculinity" GO OUTSIDE. YES THEY DO. there is a REASON fat hairy balding men tend to have our own damn spaces, because no one else will take us. FUCK.

if people want to insist that everyone around them has always recognized their soul-gender and no one is ever treated like anything but what they identify as maybe they should stop talking about what genders that aren't theirs experience

I'm a bisexual trans man who does not pass and never will pass and I have spent over 30 years of my life being told my experiences aren't real mostly by other queer people and I am so, so, so, so, SO jaded by it. I'm done. If you tell me "your lived experiences are not a real thing" then you're the villain. I can't stand it. I genuinely cannot take it anymore. I have absolutely nowhere to go and I feel so unbelievably hopeless.

Try to hang in there anon. It's okay to disengage and avoid discourse. I know it's not always possible, but there's nothing wrong with unplugging from this shit as much as you can. You have to focus on your happiness.

I love you. <3

[smoky-lucine]

Back from the Dead

Dean Winchester & Little sister!reader After Dean dies, Y/N is stuck mourning for months. When he is freed from hell, he tries to call her. Angst, Sam's mentioned but not actually there, more Bobby than anything 💀 This is my first fic i'm posting omg! hopefully it turned out alright

After Dean died things quickly fell apart. Sam clearly wasn’t okay, and neither were you. You got new cases here and there, but it wasn’t the same without Dean. You and Sam decided to slow down on hunting for the time being to grieve. Days turned into weeks, crying turned into drinking, praying turned into attempting crossroad deals, and eventually you woke up one morning alone in the motel with no trace of Sam.

You tried calling his phone for days, tracing any of his aliases, looking into any cases nearby hoping he found one on his own. He was completely gone.

After a couple weeks of searching, you called Bobby. He hasn’t heard from Sam in weeks and offered for you to stay with him instead of living from a motel. You took a bus to his home, and he greeted you with a big hug. You both don’t like to admit it, but he’s been more of a father to you than your actual dad ever was.

He let you move into his spare bedroom, and that's where you spent the first few weeks. Bobby would leave food at your door. He would sometimes try to come in and talk to you, but you weren’t very talkative anymore. Occasionally he’d practically drag you down to the library. He either needed help researching for other hunters or would tell you, “Spending all your life in that damn room won’t help you at all. I know it’s hard. We’re both hurting Y/N, but please just talk to me instead of suffering up there all day.”

Most nights he could hear your nightmares. He wasn’t there when Dean died, but he was there when you all buried his body. He couldn’t even imagine what it looked like actually seeing him die. Bobby could hear you crying in your sleep, begging Dean to keep breathing. He would come in and wake you up when you would start to scream. He couldn’t stand hearing you relive your brother's death every night.

Eventually the two of you were able to talk and mourn Dean together, slowly grieving and beginning to move on. You started to spend more time downstairs, researching, watching TV with Bobby. He even got you to go out to dinner one night.

The two of you would talk about Sam sometimes. Bobby would hear you late at night sobbing on a voicemail to him hoping he would finally pick up. You both knew he was alive, making your confusion on why Sam wouldn’t talk to you even more saddening. Bobby didn’t have much to say to comfort you anymore.

“I’m sorry kid. I know he’s out there somewhere; he’s just trying to mourn and move on too.”

One day you were cleaning up the library while Bobby made lunch, when you got a call. Nobody calls you anymore. Looking at the unknown number you cleared your throat and answered, putting the call on speaker.

“Hello?” You say, still putting away books.

The person on the line gasped. “Y/N?”

“Who is this?” Bobby hears you on the phone and stands right outside of the library to listen in.

“Y/N! It-It’s Dean! I can’t get a hold of Sam where are you guys?”

Your eyes pop out of your head, and you drop the book you were holding. “Dean? You can’t be Dean.” Your eyes cloud up with tears and Bobby runs into the library.

“Y/N it really is me please listen to me kid. Listen I don’t know-” Bobby grabs your phone and takes it off speaker.

“You listen to me idjit I don’t know how you got this number or why you think this is funny, but I better never hear you playing these kinds of damn tricks on us ever again.” You hear the person on the line start to talk but Bobby ends the call. You sat down at the desk and broke down. You hadn’t heard Dean’s voice in months, but it really did sound like him.

Bobby pulled a chair up and put his arm around you. “Kid I know you weren’t expecting for that to happen but we both know that wasn’t him.”

“How was it not?” You sobbed. “That was his voice. I know that was his voice.”

You lean into Bobby, and he holds you as you sob. He tried his best to comfort you, but he wasn’t very good at it, and he wasn’t exactly sure what was happening either. It took a while, but eventually you calmed down and you guys decided to just relax and call it an early day.

Later that night you were in your room getting your things ready to shower. You grabbed your clothes and started to make your way to the bathroom when there was a knock on the door. You weren’t sure who could be here at this hour. You put your stuff in the bathroom and start going down the stairs when you hear Bobby grab his knife and you hear a fight break out. You take your own knife out of your pocket and run to the front room.

There you see Bobby and Dean fighting. “Bobby! It’s me!” “My ass!”

You couldn’t believe Dean was right in front of you. He looks completely fine, like he wasn’t torn apart by hell hounds just a few months ago. Like you didn’t bury him just a few months ago.

“Wait! Your name is Robert Steven Singer. You became a hunter after your wife got possessed. You’re about the closest thing I have to a father.” Dean looks terrified and Bobby stands still. You drop your knife in shock and they both turn to look at you.

“Dean.” Your face is white as a ghost, your heart pounding.

Dean’s eyes soften and he stands up. “Y/N.”

He starts to walk towards you and Bobby blocks him. He stares at Dean for a second and touches his shoulder. He still doesn’t believe it. You run up and push Bobby’s arm away, hugging Dean as hard as you can. Dean hugs you back and you both sigh a breath of relief.

You pull back and take it in. Deans alive. Right in front of you.

You can’t help but to start crying for the second time that day. Dean tears up a little too. “Baby I’m so sorry. I’m sorry you had to see that happen to me.”

“I knew it had to be you calling. I was right.” You both pull back into the hug.

The three of you sit down to talk about what happened. Dean asks where Sam is, and you have to explain how he left you with no warning and you had to come here. He can’t even believe it. Bobby explains the last few months and that in the morning we can start looking for Sam again.

In the meantime, Dean takes a shower and eats an actual meal. Bobby tells him that he can either take the couch or share a bed with you. He chooses the latter.

You and Dean get in the bed and it’s still a shock that your oldest brother is right here in front of you. You lay on his chest and take a deep breath. Months ago, he wouldn’t let you come close to him if he was tired, but he thinks that tonight and possibly the next few weeks could be an exception.

“Y/N, we’re going to fix all this. I’ll make sure of it. We’re gonna find Sam, we’re gonna figure out who brought me back, and I’m going to make sure you never have to go through this again. I promise.”

“I can’t believe you're actually back. I’ve been praying for this for months.” You yawned. It’s been a long day and you both were quickly falling asleep. “I missed you.”

“I know you did kid. I missed you so much.”

[bucketsofmonsters]

Where the Light Enters - Part 20 (Final Part)

Cole/Female Inquisitor

cw: unreliable narrator, hurt/comfort, slow burn, enemies to lovers, referenced noncon, happy ending

word count: 3k

ao3 link

Masterlist

Her head was pounding. The shouting of ancient elven voices echoed in her ears, as they always did, but besides that there was this pressure, like someone was pressing down between her eyes. 

She tried to lift her arm to her head and realized that all of her limbs felt like they were made of lead. She barely managed to lift it a few inches before she just collapsed back down again, giving up on the effort completely. 

“She’s awake,” said a familiar voice. 

She felt the air of someone’s breath on her face and knew instantly it was Cole, groaning and fighting to lift her arm again in an attempt to shove him away, muttering out something resembling “I’m tired.”

She decided to attempt a less strenuous activity, cracking her eyes open, fighting to orient herself. 

She managed to open her eyes, the light worsening the throbbing in her head. 

Her vision was distant and out of focus but Cole’s silhouette was instantly recognizable. 

And then everything came flooding back to her and she jolted upright, pain running through her body, eyes wide and panicked.

“It didn’t work?” she asked, a horrible relief settling in her gut. She wanted to save them, she really did, but the rotten selfish part of her couldn’t help but be glad she was alive. 

“No,” Cole snapped. “Living isn’t selfish. Running was selfish. Dying was selfish.”

“Give her a second kid,” said Varric, and she turned to see him sitting in the corner, behind where Cole had been standing. 

“What happened?” she asked, her mind feeling heavy from exhaustion.

“Well,” Varric said, leaning forward as Cole scowled at her. “It was going awful, we were getting our asses handed to us and then everything lit up and Cole screamed like someone had just ripped his heart out of his chest. And then, all of a sudden, we were winning. It ended pretty fast after that. We assumed the worst. Cole wouldn’t talk to us, he was just muttering about some tether, saying he didn’t know if he was strong enough, insisting that it hadn’t snapped because it couldn't because then you were gone. When we came back and you were still breathing it felt like a miracle.”

“Not a miracle,” Cole spat out. “Our tether. It keeps me from the fade so when the fade tried to pull you in, it kept you here too. It works both ways. I didn’t think it was strong enough, it shouldn’t have been strong enough. Not after I was changed.”

Britches shrugged. “Maybe we got lucky.”

Varric laughed. “Maybe the power of love kept you alive.”

Cole huffed. “No. It shouldn’t have worked, I had to keep you here. I made myself heavy, dug my feet in. I almost couldn’t. You should have told me, I could have prepared, it wouldn’t have been so close. Instead you took advantage of me being out of my head. You promised you wouldn’t.”

“I’m sorry.” The words were barely loud enough to be heard, squeaking out of her, low and sad. 

Varric stood abruptly, eyes darting between them. “I’ll leave you two alone. It seems like you need to talk. For the record, I’m glad you’re okay, both of you.”

“Both of us?” she asked. “Cole wasn’t in any danger, no more than the rest of you were.”

Varric shook his head. “You didn’t see him, didn’t hear him. I’m just glad you’re still here. Don’t pull that hero shit again. It doesn’t suit you.”

He turned to leave and she didn’t even wait for him to walk out the door before tears started welling up in her eyes and she blurted out, “Are you mad at me?”

“You’re twenty,” Cole said, voice terse.

“What?”

“You turned twenty when you were unconscious. After you tried to be dead.”

“I’m…” The world came crashing down around her. She was old now, she wasn’t sure when she’d gotten so old. For so long people had wanted her because of her youth, because she was child shaped and sweet with big eyes and soft cheeks and now that was gone. 

Cole sighed. “I had a plan. To make it easier, to make it hurt less. You ruined it.” Every word sounded accusational. 

“Did you read it off me?” she asked, wondering if somehow, all of this had given him a clearer view into her head once more. 

He shook his head resolutely. “I can’t, you ruined that too, stuck the ancient voices in there. I have to know you on my own now.”

“What did you have planned,” she asked softly, uncertain of if she actually wanted to know.

“It doesn’t matter now.”

She shrugged, desperately trying to keep herself from spiralling, from letting herself think about how her only worth was gone, her youth slipping away all while surrounded by people she couldn’t lie to, people who knew her that Cole would not let her run from. She tried not to think about how her cheeks had lost some of their fullness, how she’d begun smiling more and worn little wrinkles into the corner of her eyes. She tried not to think about how she was older than any of them had ever been allowed to be before, how she was the first to make it out of her teens and she still couldn’t find it in here to be grateful, nothing but a blind panic attached to the idea. 

“It matters to me.”

He studied her, eyes locked carefully onto her face. “It’s good that you’re here,” he said. “You should be happy.”

“I know,” she conceded. “It’s stupid.”

“It is not. You can feel sad. But you will not die,” he demanded, voice firm. “You will not be that selfish. Not this time.”

“Alright,” she said, voice breaking. “I can do that.”

“You’re worth something to me,” he added, and he really was good at reading her all on his own now. She wondered when that had happened. 

“Yeah,” she said, a sad laugh escaping her. “I figured that much out. Not that I understand why, you’re too good for me.”

“You’re getting better,” he said. “And you make me happy. Have I not earned a little selfishness?”

She smiled. “Of course you have. My sweet boy, I think I’ve corrupted you.”

He shook his head. “I made you better more than you made me bad.”

She laughed, loud and incredulous. “Are you making this a competition?”

“No. But if it was, I would have won.”

“You’re such an idiot,” she said affectionately, eyes crinkling at the corners as she did. 

He smiled back, seeming content to just stare at her, eyes wide and fond. He still didn’t quite blink enough to not be deeply offputting to most, though at some point the habit seemed to have become endearing to her. 

“What now,” she asked, wondering what there was left for her, now that her use had run out. She ran her fingers absentmindedly over her palm, the one that had been used to close all those rifts. The mark seemed to be gone, having left a charred black mark in its wake. 

“Josephine said you won’t be allowed to put your grubby little paws on the Inquisition ever again,” he declared, and she laughed. 

“That is a direct quote, I assume.”

He nodded. 

“Has Solas begun asking for my arrest yet?” she asked, figuring she’d run through the list of people who hated her. “Where is he anyways? I want to gloat about surviving this. He was so wrong, it's got to be eating him alive.”

Coel shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “Solas is gone.”

She sat up a little straighter. “Gone? You mean…”

“He was…” Cole spoke slowly and carefully and for the first time perhaps ever, she got the sense that he had been lying to her. “He wasn’t what he said. He was a liar too. Like you. He meant better but he did worse, so I think he balances out.”

“I knew he was lying but what did he do?” she asked, her mind reeling. “I can’t believe he had the audacity to judge me if he was a piece of shit too.”

Cole shrugged. “He did a lot of things. He tried to fix them.”

She rolled her eyes. “Whatever. That’s a bad excuse.”

“He meant it.”

“I don’t really care. Now spit it out, what did he do? Better or worse than Blackwall’s thing? I should keep a ranking of who the worst person in the Inquisition is at this point.”

“He’s the Dreadwolf,” Cole blurted out, and then paused like that was supposed to mean anything to her. 

“Okay. What is that?” she asked. 

“He’s an elven god.”

“Oh,” she said, not even trying to remember what that meant. “An important one?”

Cole nodded. 

“Okay. Well, that’s kinda sad. He didn’t even look cool.”

“He looks cooler sometimes,” he said, almost a little wistfully. 

“I’d certainly hope so. Is there anyone here who would even care? Why was he hiding it, we don’t have any elves.”

“We have Sera,” he said, brows furrowing. 

“Real elves, I mean,” she said with a laugh.

“Non elves care about the Dreadwolf,” he informed her helpfully. 

“Okay. Well, I’m not one of them. I can’t believe I bullied a god. He should have just gone on his stupid expeditions, I don’t know why he kept asking.”

“You shouldn’t tell anyone,” Cole said. “They will think wrong things about him. He should tell them himself.”

She shrugged. “That’s fine, I don’t talk about Solas much anyway. Also, you’ve sidetracked me. I don’t care what Josephine says we can’t do and I don’t really care about Solas, all things considered. Besides, I wasn’t planning on staying in the Inquisitor much longer anyway. What do you want to do, now that this is all over?”

Cole shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve never had to decide something like this before.”

“You’re probably better off deciding, my instincts for this sort of thing are bad.”

“Yes,” Cole agreed quickly. “No decisions from you. I don’t like your choices.”

She rolled her eyes, despite knowing he was right. 

Before she could say another word, Bull came crashing through the door to her room, Dorian hovering behind him. It made her feel a little sick for reasons she couldn’t quite place. 

Dorian said, “We heard you were awake,” at the exact same time Bull pointed accusationally at her and said, with no room for doubt in his voice, “You pull that shit again and I’ll kill you myself.”

She nodded. “There’s no more reason for me to do it anyways, so I wouldn’t worry. Besides, I’ve gotten sick of playing hero.”

Bull snorted. “The one heroic sacrifice was too much for you?”

He smiled at her and her stomach churned. He is a good man. She knew that by now, was well aware of it. But she needed to leave, more than anything, needed to get out from under the weight his presence had become. 

“Yeah. I think we’re going to leave, go somewhere quieter,” she said, softly and slowly. 

Bull nodded. “I think that’s for the best. Keep yourself safe, Rosie. If you ever need someone to have your back, come find me. I’ll consider it.”

“Uh huh,” she said. “If you ever need something, you stay far away from me.”

He gave her a salute, expression halfway teasing. “Yes ma’am.”

She rolled her eyes as they left, Bull ruffling Cole’s hair and Dorian pinching his cheek affectionately as they walked out the door, that awful feeling still sitting in her stomach. Maybe it was a little lighter now, maybe it wasn’t. It was hard to tell, when you were in it. Maybe she’d be able to tell after they left. 

After they left. She hadn’t even gotten Cole to agree to it yet. 

It didn’t bode well. She remembered how Cole had said they couldn’t leave when she was revealed, how he’d said he would miss them all too much to go.  He would trap her here. Not on purpose, nor with any malicious intent, but he would. He would want to stay and she couldn’t leave. She’d stay by his side, always by his side. He was a breath of fresh air after being held underwater, the first rays of sun after a cold winter. The thought of leaving, of losing him, was unbearable. 

She grew solemn in the absence of Bull and Dorian, mind racing as her inevitable future came barreling towards her.

Cole broke her out of her spiral. “You’re thinking too hard,” he said, still sounding a little cross with her. “I can’t hear you but I know what thinking looks like.”

“I wasn’t trying to hide it,” she said with a huff.

“You’re doing it quietly. You have to tell me now, I can’t hear it.”

She smiled at how aggravated he seemed by it, still unaccustomed to being locked out of her head. “I was just thinking about how we’re going to stay, what it might look like.”

Cole seemed baffled by this statement. “You don’t want to leave?”

“I do, but you don’t. You’ve made that more than clear.”

Cole shook his head resolutely. “We will leave. A new start, where the foundations aren’t so broken. If we stay it will all topple someday, built on too many wrongs to be fixed.”

“But we can’t. You said you’d miss everyone too much,” she instead, unsure why exactly she was fighting against getting her way.

“They will visit,” he said, a finality present in his voice. “And maybe we will visit them too.”

“Whatever you want,” she said, her face falling into a calm, easy smile. 

If anything, he seemed in a rush to leave. He kept her in bed for the next few hours, despite her efforts to get up and move a little. Instead, he was frantically gathering up the few things either of them owned, eager to head out and start anew, and piling them into the room beside her. 

She was going a bit stir crazy, stuck in bed, but every time she tried to rise Cole pushed her back down, muttering about rebreaking injuries not set correctly, a pain to heal again. She insisted she didn’t have any broken bones so that didn’t apply and he stared at her like she’d lost her mind. She decided to give him a few more hours of bed rest before she started throwing a real fit.

In the midst of his frenzied packing, he ran up to her, eyes wide. “I found it again!”

“What are you talking about?” she asked, gently trying to goad something more intelligible out of him. 

“The cat!” he said, and she sighed. 

You are not bringing it with us,” she said, refusing to get mauled by that thing like he had. “Absolutely not.”

“It wants to be safe. It will need freedom but we can take it and feed it and let it get close.” 

She rolled her eyes. She was too allowing of him, she knew that. She just never could quite manage to reel it in. “Fine. But it is coming nowhere near me.”

He grinned. “For now. You’ll love it eventually.”

“Will not,” she hissed, nose scrunching up.

“You will,” he said softly. “It comes with time and patience and it comes slowly but it will come.”

“Just go get the stupid cat,” she said with a laugh. “Put it in a cage or something so it doesn’t maul you on the way there. Speaking of there, where are we going?”

He shrugged. “Anywhere. I’ll know it when I see it.”

“Will you?” she asked incredulously. 

He nodded, seeming entirely serious on the matter. “I will. You always know home when you see it.”

She shook her head softly, staring at the way he hunched over on himself, his posture awful; staring at his hands, the way he flexed them as he spoke, unable to keep still; staring at his shaggy hair, grown out and hanging in his eyes once more behind that stupid hat; and she smiled. 

“I guess you do.”

[mexican-cryptdez]

LETS FINISH THIS BOOK

Raptors will messing with Ellie (I am worried)

Wu making dinos an ego and reputation thing is fine but can not just be that. I'm glad these raptors are scaring you

ELLIE PLZ GET INSIDE

OMFG WU!!!

Oh I'm going to be sick...... That's .....

DID MULDOON JUST SHUT ELLIE OUT?!?

Harding we can't be this chill

Fuck not the visitor center

Grant we do have a choice here

Gennaro stay strong plz

This is what flight instinct looks like fr keep going Ellie

WHY CAN RAPTORS CLIMB TREES?!

Ellie you badass good jump

HARDING CLOSE THE ROOF DOOR NOW!!!

Fucking hell Harding.... I hope that's survivable

Ok Tim do your thing in the control room I guess

I'm sorry somebodys ear?!?!? Who the hell lost their ear?!?!?

Wait Arnold? Is that your ear? Or who is missing an ear

LEX THIS ISNT FINDERS KEEPERS DO SOMETHING WITH THE RADIO OR GIVE IT UP.....and she dropped it the moment an adult voice speaks

Well Grant.... About that the kids aren't there anymore but there is a raptor there

Wait a minute- do the other raptors know about their comrade? Can they hear the very cold raptor from where they are?

Muldoon thanks for being here honestly and not disclosing disturbing information to people who will freak out.

(Not telling Timmy that every computer guy is dead was a good call)

Tim it's ok not to know but sure take a wack at it

Lex plz....

Well hold on neither kid knows what to do on the fact that they're kids.... I can't be harsh on Lex

Touch screen was a surprise tho

Oh Tim is in the computer trenches now

Hey Tim can I know why you went out the control room? With Lex?

God Tim you're either going to grow up to do some adrenaline inducing career or do nothing after this and either one is valid

Welcome to the scene Hammond

Who could've imagined Hammond?!?! WHO?!?

That's right Ellie MALCOM DID

Sorry Malcolm calculated

Good Hammond I hope he continues for more hours saying "I told you so"

Hammond you need to stop dismissing Malcolm before I get you

YOU CAN'T BE RELYING ON YOUR GRANDSON TO SAVE THE SITUATION

Grant is not liking this finding game

THE BABY RAPTOR!!

I'm not ok..... Oh my God the baby.....

AFTER IT WAS YEETED TOO

I can't....

I will

Great kids have found Grant and Gennaro I am calm(er)

Grant our hero

Great Job Timmy you did great

GENNARO COME THROUGH WITH THE IMPROV

Glad the boat situation is handled

Malcolms speech " the planet is fine and will be fine after us our concern should be how will we survive longer on the timeline" and yeah he's right

24 people.... 8 dead and 6 missing

Damn this book is something

Until morning?!? Fucking hell all that and they have to wait more

Oh the dino count is sad and worrying

Jurassic equilibrium

Muldoon and Gennaro dreaming about the bombing of Jurassic Park is great

Grant???? What's going on in your head now?

Now I completely agree with you Grant but come on all that wasn't necessary (Grant has done no wrong)

I forgot Gennaro was like an investor and like also a reason this island happened

Alright game plan abort the raptor eggs

RIP(?) Arnold you should've gone to the mystery storage room

Nah get Hammond to do some work too

Why the hell are there grenades in the mystery storage room

Muldoon asks for weapons and gets turned down and is only allowed one but there are grenades down here?!?

Lex bonding with the baby dinos

Clarence??? Get better at naming babies lex

Lex is so confident in her motherly aura

Oh shit the raptors can be trans

I think people forget that Grant dealt with these dinos as bones and fossils like just just spitting theories half the time hoping they land with new information this park is shoving his way

Gennaro.... Stay in your lane before Grant shoves you against another wall (no homo)

Grant is wearing what again? (Cowboy boots, jeans, and a Hawaiian shirt)

Grant did all that looking like a tourist in Vegas

Gennaro.... You've never had anything you waited your life for? How rich are you? Or better yet do you not have anything past a 5-year plan?

Grant not letting Gennaro off any hook God damn

Where's Hammond I want him to do this too

Grant? Bestie? You doing good down there? Going to kill the babies I hope?

Glad Malcolm's impending death fills you with anxiety and dread Hammond

Fuck off Hammond this whole thing has proven you're not the boss of anything

I'm going to off Hammond

HES STILL PLANNING MORE PARKS

HES GOT MORE EMBRYOS

FUCK OFF YOU WONT BLAME WU FOR THIS

OR ARNOLD

Fuck off each one had "vision" Hammond but reality struck in this park and everyone but you was hit with it

The Rican workmen are insolent oh you can fuck right off Hammond

BABY REX

Well a broken ankle for Hammond

Oh I need something to get Hammond immediately

HES BLAMING THE KIDS FOR THE TROUBLE NOW?!?!?

He's pissy cause he got scared but I wish for him to be terrified

Malcom please don't die

Tell us more about this beyond paradigm shift

Lmao not Muldoon threatening Gennaro with the shock stick

Jesus Christ there's a lot of babies down there

Grant ... You want to do a count?

Hey let's not do anything rash when we're outnumbered

34 born?!?!? Christ

Huh they stand weird

Well don't have time for all that now

And the raptors are running.....

I can't believe Hammond is blaming the kids because he broke his ankle

76 years old is too old to be climbing hillsides but it is mighty fine dino-keeping age (it's like bee keeping age but when you're Hammond specifically)

Compy!

Oh hell ... They got him

Not to be like morbid or horrible but of his last thoughts are that Malcom is still wrong I can't feel super bad

But in the perspective of nature is doing its thing and all of this isn't actually chaos or whatever..... Sure but THIS (*gestures to all of the blasted park*) wasn't supposed to actually happen dinos went extinct

Why are the raptors interested in freighters?

Omfg migration instincts.....

UBER HELICOPTER

Damn no one is in charge

Hammond confirmed dead? Plz

MALCOLM NOOOOOOOOO

In blazes the dinosaurs meet their end once more

Yeah sorry officer anyone who was in charge is dead

Gennaro only invested or whatever

Damn no burial for Hammond or Malcom

Brutal

Stay strong Grant keep your story straight

Oh my God it's Dr. Marty Gutierrez

Completely forgot about him

Oh something very peculiar?

Strange animals eating crops in a migratory line

Oh shit lysine

Keeping Grant in Costa Rica to figure this shit out

THE END

Jurassic park- live reaction

Worker got mauled

We don't know what raptors are apparently

But I guess since no one really thinks about dinos anymore (at least in the modern context it make sense no one thinks dino so far)

Big business guy is shady AF (not surprised)

OUR CAMERA

A little trip with the family!

I'm sure the husband is doing his best but that mom needs serious help

Uh oh lizard appeared.... AND ITS ON HER?!!

Yeah it bit her but she's alive

Lil kid is observant AF classic 8 year old

When I tell you this doctor pisses me off the way he talk to the parents

Doc is simultaneously dismissing and knowing something is up

Is this the crib scene everyone talks about? Not creepy at all abuela scared it off.

Raptor just got a couple nibbles in

New York doctor leaving vital information out

ANOTHER BABY VICTIM

This one was but creepy

Yikes that's a sight I would not like to see ever

Still got scared off (raptor)

[hinamie]

to moving forward

[yourlocalabomination]

Tick Tock, Teddy-Bear.

[wlwanakin]

CONJOINED.

the symposium by plato / attack of the clones (2002) dir. george lucas / “da selby pt 2” by hozier / interview with the vampire (2022) s1e7 “the thing lay still” / revenge of the sith (2005) dir. george lucas / revenge of the sith by matthew stover / wuthering heights by emily brontë / “claw machine” by sloppy jane and phoebe bridgers / wild space by karen miller / hannibal (2013) s3e6 “dolce” / dead ringers screenplay by norman snider and david cronenberg / dead ringers (1988) dir. david cronenberg / children’s hospital of philadelphia